Having a good relationship is a wonderful addition to your life. When you’re in love, your outlook changes and everything feels a bit different.
We’ve looked at the signs you’ve found the one - how many of these do you agree with? Whether you're still getting to know your partner or you are in a long term relationship, there are lots of little things that can make you feel like you've found your other half.
“A soulmate is a person who you have a natural affinity with,” says dating coach and relationship expert Jo Barnett. “You feel like you have know them for all your life and they are a part of you.”
If you feel like this about the person you’re with, make sure you read all of our signs that you’ve found the one. If you find yourself beaming and nodding as you read, you know you have found your soulmate!
How Do You Know You’ve Found The One?
Jo shared her top three signs to help you know when you’ve found the one:
- The relationship flows and it’s easy, it has been since you met.
- There is a mutual respect and admiration beyond attraction.
- You think similarly and can discuss things at great length, never getting bored.
Do You ‘Just Know’ When You’ve Found Your Soulmate?
Some might say ‘you just know’ when you’ve found the one, but that’s not always the case - it can be a slow burn. A lot of love is learning about another person, and just because you didn’t get that feeling from the moment you first locked eyes, it doesn’t mean it won’t come with time. 40% of Hitched users said it took time to realise they were with the one.*
Whether you felt an instant connection or you built up your love over time, you still need to spend time working on your relationship and helping it to grow - learning both yours and your partner’s love language can help with this.
30 Signs You’re With the One
1. They Lift Your Spirits
It doesn’t matter what kind of day you’re having, knowing you’re going to see your partner makes you smile. When just the thought of being in their presence makes your spirits lift, you know you’ve found the one.
2. You Count Down the Minutes
It doesn’t matter if you’re in the first flush of romance or you’re five years down the line, you find yourself eagerly counting down until you’re next in their company. It doesn't matter if it’s for a romantic dinner date or just to watch the next episode of Breaking Bad that evening with a glass of wine.
3. You’re Not Scared to Dream With Them
You can talk about all your plans, dreams and hopes with them without worrying. When you’re open to sharing your future plans with somebody, and see them as a part of those plans, that’s a great sign that you’re with a keeper.
4. You Want Similar Things
It’s a good sign if you want the same things in life; you’re much more likely to stay the course together if your wants align. You know you both want a house by the sea and a dog one day, and you’re working together towards that goal.
5. You Trust Them Completely
If you’re in a relationship where you feel the need to read each other’s messages or hate them spending time with people who aren’t you, you need to re-evaluate. When you’re with the one, you can trust them and they trust you too.
6. You Have Rituals You Like to Stick To
You won’t skip ahead on your Netflix series without them, nor would you go to their favourite coffee shop without them - or at least without bringing them a takeaway cup home! You value your traditions and rituals because they are important to both of you and help you to feel close to each other.
7. You Feel Calm with Them
In the past, you might have felt a bit anxious with someone or not always known where you stood. Now you feel calm and secure and safe in your relationship and it’s wonderful.
8. You Don’t Argue Much
You might not agree on everything, but you respect each other enough to understand and accept your differences and are willing to compromise on things for the sake of your partnership.
9. You Accept Their Flaws
They are never ever going to load the dishwasher the exact way you like it, or remember to hang up the bathmat - they’ll try, but no one is perfect. What matters is that you understand your partner will have flaws - as do you - and you accept them, instead of trying to change them or letting resentment build.
10. You Can Be Open With Each Other
You can voice your concerns and share what’s bothering you without it being a huge drama because you trust each other and you feel safe enough to be open about issues before they become a much bigger deal.
11. It’s Okay to Be Vulnerable
You might have issues from previous relationships, phobias or things that stress you out. But in this relationship, you can let your guard down and share these things without fear of judgement when you’re with the right person.
12. You Do Things Just for Them
You spend time on little gestures just to show them how much you care and value them, like buying their favourite chocolate bar or sending them a cute text, because you want to show them you care.
13. You Can Rely on Them
You know that they know you. They can order a drink for you at a crowded bar or pick out something from the menu for you when you’re running late and you know that they will pick out something good for you.
14. It Becomes 'We’, Not 'I'
If someone asks you what you’re doing at the weekend, you find yourself naturally replying with ‘We are…’ instead of ‘I am…’. It just feels natural to talk about yourself as a unit, not a single entity.
15. You Can Read Each Other
You know when they want to go home, they know when you are getting hangry; you’re so in tune you’ve learned to read each other’s signals and respond to them.
16. You Know Exactly How to Lift Each Other Up
You know the right things to do or say to each other to cheer each other up when you’re feeling down, and you do it without thinking because their happiness is your priority.
17. You Know When You Need Space
Sometimes the only thing to do is to give each other space. Maybe they need time to decompress or you prefer to be alone to process news. You can tell when you need that time and are secure enough to wait it out.
18. You Have Hobbies
It might be your true crime obsession or maybe you love hiking? Whatever it is, there’s something that the two of you do together that’s ‘your thing’.
READ MORE: 21 Fun Gift Experiences for Couples
19. You Have Your Own Lives Too
You don’t have to do absolutely everything together though - it’s important to both of you that you have time to do your own stuff and it makes you both more rounded individuals as a result.
20. The Little Things Make You Smile
You know when you meet someone new they’re going to tell the anecdote about their nickname or make the same joke about their job, and instead of rolling your eyes, you love it! It’s one of the things that makes them who they are and you live for seeing other people laugh at the thing you get to hear all the time.
21. Even Boring Stuff Is Enjoyable
You’ve got to go to IKEA to get new dining chairs? Yes! A fun afternoon of exploring and shopping for the weirdest named products you can find. Nothing is dull when you get to do it with your bestie.
22. Everyone Loves Them
It’s not just you who loves them - your family and friends adore them too! If someone is right for you, it’s a hugely promising sign that everyone in your life loves them almost as much as you do.
23. You Have a Secret Language
It’s not a full on language, but you have your codewords and nicknames for things that only you two understand. Sometimes you can’t even remember why you use the words you do, but it’s stuck and it’s never going to change!
24. You’ve Become Cheesy
You used to scoff at people who changed their phone background to a picture of their partner. Now, you’ve gone even further and your WhatsApp chat background is a picture of them! It’s not so bad being a little bit cheesy with the one you love.
25. Some Stuff Is Just For You
Like your cheesy gestures or private language, some things are just for the two of you to share. You feel secure and close enough that you don’t need to publish every aspect of your life online or overshare in the group chat - it’s actually quite nice to hold some stuff back for just the two of you.
26. You Make the Effort - But It Doesn't Feel Like Effort
You plan date nights or splash out on the odd couple's sex toy to spice things up because it’s important to you to put the effort in and work at your relationship. You get out what you put in, after all!
27. Sometimes There Are Sacrifices
Sometimes you have to make sacrifices to suit your partner, but that’s okay because you know it’s give and take. Sometimes you are making the sacrifice, sometimes they are; it all evens out in the end. This is known as a ‘costly commitment signal’ - and it does cost you, in time, money or emotions - but it is a sign of your commitment to your partner and your relationship.
28. Their Feedback Is Important
You value their opinions and thoughts on the decisions you need to make. Whether it’s a weekend plan or your next career move, you want to hear what they have to say because you respect them and they want what’s best for you.
29. It Feels Easy
It’s not always perfect, but it never feels like hard work. One of the key signs you’ve found your soulmate is that most of the time, it feels easy and effortless to be with them.
30. You Can’t Believe Your Luck
Every day you think ‘Wow, how did I get so lucky?’ and you know they feel the same. Out of all the millions and millions of people in the world, you found someone whose weirdness perfectly aligns with yours.
Now you are safe in the knowledge that you've found your soulmate, make sure you read our relationship advice from dating experts and real couples, because you can never have too much good advice!
*A survey of 1,070 Hitched Instagram followers found that 40% said it took time to find the one, whereas 60% said they knew straight away