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Aaaack (aak) interj.
An utterance upon running directly into a spider web first thing in the
morning - and you don't know where the spider is.
Airhead (er*hed) n.
What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled over by a policeman.
Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n.
A discussion that occurs when you're right, but he just hasn't realized
it yet.
Balance the checkbook (bal*ens da chek*buk) v.
To go to the cash machine and hit "inquire."
Bar-be-que (bar*bi*q) n
You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce, chopped the tomatoes, diced
the onions, marinated the meat and cleaned everything up, but *he* "made the
dinner."
Blonde jokes (blond joks) n.
Jokes that are short so men can understand them.
Clothes dryer (kloze dri*yer) n.
An appliance designed to eat socks.
Diet Soda (dy*it so*da) n.
A drink you buy at a convenience store to go with a half pound bag of peanut
M&Ms.
Eternity (e*ter*ni*tee) n.
The last two minutes of a basketball game.
Exercise (ex*er*siz) v
To walk up and down a mall, occasionally resting to make a purchase.
Grocery List (grow*ser*ee list) n.
What you spend half an hour writing, then forget to take with you to the
store.
Hardware Store (hard*war stor) n
Similar to a black hole in space - if he goes in, he isn't coming out anytime
soon.
Patience (pa*shens) n.
The most important ingredient for dating, marriage and children.
See also "tranquilizers".
Valentine's Day (val*en*tinez dae) n.
A day when you have dreams of a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance,
but consider yourself lucky to get a card.
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