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30 Great Ways to Start Your Best Man's Speech

Know all the killer content you want inside, but not sure how to get started? These best man speech openers are bound to help!

a best man opening his speech with funny lines

If you want to nail your five minutes of fame at your best mate's wedding, brilliant best man speech opening lines are the way to do it. The first few lines of your best man speech set the tone for the rest of it, so getting your best man opening lines right is vital.

The traditional order of wedding speeches sees the best man speech opening line follow on from the groom and father of the bride, so you're likely to have pretty big shoes to fill, and there's no better way to get the crowd on your side than a killer opening. 

Great opening lines for a best man speech very in theme and tone - so we've made sure this guide has something for everyone!

30 Brilliant Best Man Speech Opening Lines

an audience of wedding guests cheering after the best man opening his speech with great lines

Whether you're after a formal best man speech introduction, some funny lines to warm up the room or a few best man speech openers to preface some sentimental stories, we've got something to suit you.

Choose between sweet, sentimental, sarcastic, sassy and more! 

1. Last Minute Best Man Opener

Are you known for always being forgetful and a bit slap-dash? If so, why not use your best man speech introduction to poke fun at yourself about it. 

“Hi, I’m [x] and it’s time for me to do this speech I scribbled down about an hour before the ceremony started.”

2. Wedding Jokes

This light-hearted wedding joke is a great way to get some giggles at the start of your speech without saying anything about anyone in particular. 

“I must admit, I’m not accustomed to public speaking. Up until I was asked to give this speech, I thought a toastmaster was a kind of kitchen appliance!”

3. Cramping Your Style

Is the groom a bit of a buffoon? And are you a single pringle? If so, this best man speech opening line is perfect. 

“Hi, I’m [x] and in the run up to the wedding many people have asked me how I’ll cope now my best friend is married and will spend all his time at home loved up with his partner. And the truth is, I’m thrilled. I’m finally able to talk to women without him cramping my style!”

4. Unexpected Announcement

This quick-witted joke is the house rules announcement no one saw coming. 

“Right, I’d just like to start by laying down a couple of rules. Firstly, if you do have a mobile phone…please, leave it switched on; keep yourselves entertained. And secondly, if anyone texts you any good jokes, could you please forward them to me?”

5. Not a Pleasure

This stereotypical 'act like you don't want to be doing a speech' vibe works for so many best men. 

“My name is [x] and it’s an honour to stand here as [x]’s best man. I’d like to say it’s a pleasure too, but that won’t be the case until I’ve finished this speech…”

6. The Internet Intro

Give the impression you've printed this speech off the internet to warm the crowd up. 

"It's a pleasure to stand here as the best man to 'insert name here'. Oh wait, I was supposed to edit that bit out before I printed it off..."

7. I'm the Best

Rub it in to the rest of the group that you're officially the groom's favourite.

“My name is [x] and I’m officially the best man. It might have taken [x] amount of years, but [x] has finally admitted I’m the best.”

8. Your Writing

This one's a classic, and you can tailor the adjectives to ensure it's the kind of thing your friend would actually write for you. 

“Hello, I’m [x] and I’m here to tell you all about [x] and how wonderful, handsome and…sorry, mate, I can’t read your writing.”

9. My Only Chance

Is it a running joke that the groom never picks up the bill? If so, you could poke a bit of fun at it in your best man opener lines. 

"Thank you for having me as your best man [x], I didn’t really want to do it, but I thought it might be the only chance I’ll get to have a meal and some drinks paid for by you, so I didn’t risk turning it down.”

10. To the Groom

Think your friend has excellent taste in friends? Start off by telling everyone that, then. 

"Hello everyone, I’d like to start this speech off by congratulating the groom on his excellent taste in best men. He’s really outdone himself."

11. That's Me Done

This is a brilliantly funny best man speech introduction, and also acts as a great way to skim over stereotypical topics and get into some more personal anecdotes. 

"The happy couple have asked that I don’t share any embarrassing stories, stag do pranks or crude jokes in my best man’s speech… so that’s it from me! Thanks for listening."

12. My Word Means Nothing

If you are going to go down the route of telling some funny stag do stories, this is a hilarious way to introduce them. 

"[x] asked me not to mention any of the scandals from the stag do, and I said I wouldn't. But as you all know, I'm a compulsive liar and my word means nothing, so here goes nothing..."

13. Enough About Me

There's nothing wrong with using your best man opening lines to compliment yourself, right?

"Gorgeous, loyal, charming, handsome...but today isn't about me. Now, let's talk about [x]."

14. Worst Day of Their Lives

We love this best man opener line, it's a funny way of saying you wish the couple all the happiness in the world. 

"My only wish for the happy couple is that each day of their marriage is better than the previous so that they can look back on today, their wedding day, and say that it was the worst day of their lives."

15. Only Joking

Is your best friend's partner a stickler for plans and precision? If so, this is a fun way to address that. 

"Good evening. I’m pleased to be delivering the only five minutes that the [x] didn’t meticulously plan. Of course, I’m only joking. She went over the speech with me half an hour ago in the bar."

16. Sweepstake

Wedding speeches going on for too long is a stereotype that's fun to lean into, and starting off your best man's speech with this line will have everyone laughing, and also leave them feeling relieved that you're aware 45 minutes is too long, and will hopefully be finished soon!

"I just heard about the sweepstake people have on how long the best man speech should last. I put my money on 45 minutes, so make yourselves comfortable everyone…"

17. Dead Body At a Funeral

Have you and all the guests got a dry sense of humour? 

"A best man is just like a dead body at a funeral. You’re expected to be there, but if you start talking, everyone starts freaking out."

18. Standing Ovation

Looking for confident great opening lines for a best man speech? 

"Now before I get started, I have a quick health and safety notice. The venue team have kindly asked that during your standing ovation, you do not stand on the tables or chairs. I know it'll be difficult to celebrate calmly, but please, safety first!"

19. Dancing Lesson

This light-hearted joke will get everyone excited for the first dance. 

"Good evening everyone, my name is [x] and I'm the best man. I’ll try to keep my speech short, because every minute I speak is an extra minute’s delay in witnessing how the [x]'s dance lessons worked out."

20. I'm the Best Man

We love this opening line, it's fun and a great way to start your best man speech. 

"You’ve got no idea how much I’ve been looking forward to today. After all the years I’ve been friends with the groom, he has finally admitted that I am in fact the best man."

21. Unfortunately, I'm Married

This best man speech opening is a great way to compliment your friend and get some laughs at the same time.

"[x] had the honour of being my best man. He spent months writing a perfect, tender and charming speech. Everyone agreed it was funny and beautiful. Unfortunately I’m married, so I haven’t had the time to do all that."

22. Slept Like a Baby

Guests love it when you poke fun at yourself, so use your best man speech opening to self-deprecate. 

"I’ve been worried about giving this speech for a while now. Fortunately last night I slept like a baby, AKA waking up every two hours and bawling my eyes out."

23. Hard to Follow

If the person before you can take a poking, this is a funny speech introduction for the best man. 

"I always knew the groom’s speech would be hard to follow. In fact, I couldn’t understand a word of it." 

24. The Drinks Bill

Is it even a best man speech introduction if you don't reference the cost of the wedding?

"Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve now reached the point in the proceedings when we all get to see the groom squirm uncomfortably in his seat and grip the table in nervous anticipation. That’s right, I’ve been asked to give him the drinks bill." 

25. Making Love

This is a cheeky one, but not half as bad as some of the best man speech opening lines we've heard before! 

"I read somewhere that the perfect best man speech should last as long as it takes for the groom to make love. So please could everyone raise a glass to the happy couple!" 

26. Don't Get What You Want

Way to compliment your friend's partner and get a little dig in about them all at the same time. 

“We all know [x] is a wonderful woman and deserves the perfect man. Unfortunately, you don’t always get what you deserve.”

27. Cost of a Stamp

This fun best man speech introduction won't get you into any real trouble, but will ensure you get off to a good start.

“My name is [x] and [x] asked me to be his best man a year ago – although I never actually received a formal invitation to the wedding. Let’s hope I haven’t eaten someone else’s meal by mistake – but more likely, it was [x] saving himself the cost of a stamp.”

28. Terrible Hangover

If you're likely to have a sore head on the day of the wedding, you might as well get it all out in the open at the beginning of the speech. 

“If you could keep the clapping and cheering to a minimum today - I’ve got a pretty bad hangover. I know you shouldn’t drink heavily before a big event but I couldn’t let [x] drink alone, could I?"

29. Emotional Day

This one is as cheesy as it is classic, but it's a crowd-pleaser if we've ever heard one. 

“Hi, I’m the best man and can I start by saying what an emotional day it’s been today? Even the cake is in tiers.”

30. Still Had Hair

If your pal can take a little joke about their appearance, why not eh?!

“My name is [x] and I’ve known [x] since we were at school – yes, I knew him when he still had hair!”

If you want to make your best man’s speech even better, we’ve got a bunch of hilarious tried and tested best man jokes that will have everyone laughing!