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Happyyellowcakes15704
Newbie Bride August 2021 Cheshire

Weekday wedding. How to make people invited not feel obligated to attend?

Happyyellowcakes15704, 14 November 2020 at 13:47 Posted on Wedding Planning 0 6
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So my fiance and I have decided to book a Wednesday wedding as it's cheaper, we were both born on that day and got engaged so it felt right.

I don't want guests to feel obliged to book time off work and travel ( as we have guests all over the UK coming).
Can anyone suggest what to write on the wedding invites to put help guests feel less guilty declining?From experience I know that guests can feel obliged to attend weddings however I don't want to pressure people into booking time off as we know the ones that we really want there will be. I know people have little poems asking for honeymoon funds so just wondered if there was one for a weekday wedding as we know it'll be an inconvenience.Thanks in advance.

6 replies

Latest activity by Charlotte, 18 November 2020 at 08:02
  • Charlotte
    Dedicated Bride February 2022 South East London
    Charlotte ·
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    It's really hard! I am trying to word something so that our guests don't feel obligated to bring their children. We actually would really like the children we're inviting to come, but I don't want their parents to feel obligated to bring them if they would rather get a babysitter. When I asked on here about wording, the consensus was that it sounded like I didn't want children there, however I put it! I think this is the same. People won't know for sure that everyone got the same poem/invite/text, so they might think you are trying to put them off and don't want them there!

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  • Happyyellowcakes15704
    Newbie Bride August 2021 Cheshire
    Happyyellowcakes15704 ·
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    Thanks so much for your response. Very helpful. Its so tricky as you don't want to offend anyone but then not feel like they are under any pressure. I think I'll leave it too.
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  • Charlotte
    Dedicated Bride February 2022 South East London
    Charlotte ·
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    You're probably best not putting anything in writing but roping in trusted family/friends to put the word around that you don't want people to feel pressured to come. That's what we're doing for the children thing, and also gifts.

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  • R
    Rockstar Bride July 2020 Monmouthshire
    RomanticGreenStationery27135 ·
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    If you don't have that many guests, maybe word of mouth is the way forward. If you have loads, then it's probably best to just leave it.

    Most people won't take time off unless they want to.

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  • Happyyellowcakes15704
    Newbie Bride August 2021 Cheshire
    Happyyellowcakes15704 ·
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    Yes I'm hoping guests that won't take time off don't come as I don't want people to feel guilty to not attend. It's 60 people so will have a think about word of mouth depending on the groups of people.
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  • R
    RomanticPurpleStationery48127 ·
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    Omg, I never realized it would be this hard thinking about the best words for making such a letter. I think if you know someone you invited will be feeling obligated, then it's time for you to let them know over-the-phone that it will still be okay if they decide to not attend due to work or other important reasons.

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