Questions From The Smash Hits Biscuit Tin

1) Do you empty your own hoover bag? No, it's bagless.

2) Did you ever pass yor Cycling Proficiency test as a child? A what now? I guess not!

3) What colour is happiness? It's pink and fluffy. Yes, a fluffy colour.

4) Does your mum play golf? No, her Boyfriend does though.

5) Are you any good at potato sculptures? Yes! I carved a pumpkin out of a raw pumpkin last month and made mash into a hedgehog this month - Can tell I work with children, this wasn't for my own meal honest!

6) Do you like sardines? YUCK! Nope, don't like any fish.

7) If you were married to Freddie Mercury, would you let him keep the moustache? (yes I know this question doesn't apply now, but I liked it!) Of course.

8) What colour is January? White.

9) Have you ever heard voices in your head? Who hasn't?

10) Why did you get so fat? I ate a sofa as a child.

11) Did you ever have a rocking horse when you were a child? Yes, it was white, red and black.. I remember it well!

12) Do you think that Antiques Roadshow is boring? Yep, very much so.

13) Can you think of a good poem about Wet Wet Wet? Wet wet wet are *** *** ***? It seems I can't, no.

14) Have you ever milked a cow? A pretend one that squirted out water, yes.

15) Have you ever thought you were a bus stop? Well, yeah, and I was! Owls about that?

16) Have you ever owned an Austrian shepherd-boy puppet? Yeah, have a collection of them in my attic.

17) If you were a kangaroo, what would you keep in your pouch? A joey, durrr!

18) Have you got any nice crockery? Yes, my Cath Kidston and Emma Bridgewater beauties.

19) Do you know anyone called Tarquin? No but it made me think of AJ!

20) Have you got a Ronald McDonald toothbrush? No, mine's Barbie.

1) Do you empty your own hoover bag? No, bagless. And it's Boy's job.

2) Did you ever pass yor Cycling Proficiency test as a child? No.

3) What colour is happiness? Yellow.

4) Does your mum play golf? No.

5) Are you any good at potato sculptures? I don't know. I could be really good at it.

6) Do you like sardines? No.

7) If you were married to Freddie Mercury, would you let him keep the moustache? (yes I know this question doesn't apply now, but I liked it!) Yes.

8) What colour is January? Blue.

9) Have you ever heard voices in your head? My own.

10) Why did you get so fat? When did that happen?

11) Did you ever have a rocking horse when you were a child? Yes. Well, a rocking donkey.

12) Do you think that Antiques Roadshow is boring? Yes.

13) Can you think of a good poem about Wet Wet Wet? Marti Pellow was a handsome fellow.

14) Have you ever milked a cow? No.

15) Have you ever thought you were a bus stop? No. I once dreamt I was a golf ball though.

16) Have you ever owned an Austrian shepherd-boy puppet? No.

17) If you were a kangaroo, what would you keep in your pouch? Baby kangaroos.

18) Have you got any nice crockery? Yes.

19) Do you know anyone called Tarquin? No.

20) Have you got a Ronald McDonald toothbrush? No.

1) Do you empty your own hoover bag? no, Bagless!

2) Did you ever pass yor Cycling Proficiency test as a child? Yes I did. They stud me a RoSPA sticker on my crossbar.

3) What colour is happiness? pink

4) Does your mum play golf? nope

5) Are you any good at potato sculptures? never tried!

6) Do you like sardines? On holiday, grilled ones yes. Tinned ones, no.

7) If you were married to Freddie Mercury, would you let him keep the moustache? (yes I know this question doesn't apply now, but I liked it!) Yes.

8) What colour is January? White

9) Have you ever heard voices in your head? Ha ha all the time.

10) Why did you get so fat? Because I like crisps and wine

11) Did you ever have a rocking horse when you were a child? Yeah, it was more like a donkey though I think.

12) Do you think that Antiques Roadshow is boring? No, I love it.

13) Can you think of a good poem about Wet Wet Wet? No.

14) Have you ever milked a cow? Yes I had a pull of a teet on a school day trip to the farm

15) Have you ever thought you were a bus stop? No.

16) Have you ever owned an Austrian shepherd-boy puppet? No.

17) If you were a kangaroo, what would you keep in your pouch? Lipgloss.

18) Have you got any nice crockery? I used to have a lovely Wedgwood set but my ex got it in the split!

19) Do you know anyone called Tarquin? No

20) Have you got a Ronald McDonald toothbrush? No but I used to have a Hamburglar one when I was about 5.

SNAP!!! lol.

1) Do you empty your own hoover bag? Yes

2) Did you ever pass yor Cycling Proficiency test as a child? No

3) What colour is happiness? Yellow, or sometimes pink

4) Does your mum play golf? No

5) Are you any good at potato sculptures? Not tried them for a while, but probably not!

6) Do you like sardines? No

7) If you were married to Freddie Mercury, would you let him keep the moustache? (yes I know this question doesn't apply now, but I liked it!) If I were married to Freddie Mercury, I would be concerned about a whole lot of other things before the moustache...

8) What colour is January? Blue-grey

9) Have you ever heard voices in your head? No

10) Why did you get so fat? Because pastry and chocolate is tasty

11) Did you ever have a rocking horse when you were a child? No ☹️

12) Do you think that Antiques Roadshow is boring? Mostly, yes

13) Can you think of a good poem about Wet Wet Wet? No

14) Have you ever milked a cow? No

15) Have you ever thought you were a bus stop? Erm, what?

16) Have you ever owned an Austrian shepherd-boy puppet? I have a little porcelain statue of one on my windowsill at home

17) If you were a kangaroo, what would you keep in your pouch? Phone, keys, purse etc - but do kangaroos need any of that?

18) Have you got any nice crockery? Not really

19) Do you know anyone called Tarquin? I met one once, but don't KNOW anyone with the name now

20) Have you got a Ronald McDonald toothbrush? No!

1) Do you empty your own hoover bag? Yes

2) Did you ever pass yor Cycling Proficiency test as a child? Yes

3) What colour is happiness? Yellow

4) Does your mum play golf? No

5) Are you any good at potato sculptures? No

6) Do you like sardines? Yes

7) If you were married to Freddie Mercury, would you let him keep the moustache? (yes I know this question doesn't apply now, but I liked it!) Yes

8) What colour is January? White

9) Have you ever heard voices in your head? Just my own

10) Why did you get so fat? 3 kids but i am not fat at the moment

11) Did you ever have a rocking horse when you were a child? Yes

12) Do you think that Antiques Roadshow is boring? Yes

13) Can you think of a good poem about Wet Wet Wet?

Marti Pellow you were so hot

Singing your songs and shaking your bot

A druggie from Glasgow you did very well

And all the girls thought you were swell

14) Have you ever milked a cow? Yes

15) Have you ever thought you were a bus stop? No

16) Have you ever owned an Austrian shepherd-boy puppet? No

17) If you were a kangaroo, what would you keep in your pouch? Food

18) Have you got any nice crockery? Yes

19) Do you know anyone called Tarquin? No

20) Have you got a Ronald McDonald toothbrush? No

1) Do you empty your own hoover bag? No, I have a cleaner.

2) Did you ever pass yor Cycling Proficiency test as a child? Yes, mum probably still has the certificate somewhere

3) What colour is happiness? Yellow

4) Does your mum play golf? Pah! no.

5) Are you any good at potato sculptures? Probably not. I'm hopeless at anything artistic

6) Do you like sardines? Bleurgh - no

7) If you were married to Freddie Mercury, would you let him keep the moustache? (yes I know this question doesn't apply now, but I liked it!) He wouldn't be Freddie without the moustache, but it'd be a bit itchy

8) What colour is January? light blue

9) Have you ever heard voices in your head? just my own

10) Why did you get so fat? cos I like cakes and pies

11) Did you ever have a rocking horse when you were a child? No, but I wish I had

12) Do you think that Antiques Roadshow is boring? Yes, very

13) Can you think of a good poem about Wet Wet Wet? Nope

14) Have you ever milked a cow? Probably when I was younger on my grandparents' farm

15) Have you ever thought you were a bus stop? That's a silly question!

16) Have you ever owned an Austrian shepherd-boy puppet? No, but I did have a proper wooden puppet and my sister and I used to put on puppet shows!

17) If you were a kangaroo, what would you keep in your pouch? My lipstick

18) Have you got any nice crockery? No, but I'd love to

19) Do you know anyone called Tarquin? No

20) Have you got a Ronald McDonald toothbrush? No, mine is boring purple.

1) Do you empty your own hoover bag? - No

2) Did you ever pass yor Cycling Proficiency test as a child? - No

3) What colour is happiness? - Gold

4) Does your mum play golf? - No

5) Are you any good at potato sculptures? - Probably not!

6) Do you like sardines? - No

7) If you were married to Freddie Mercury, would you let him keep the moustache? (yes I know this question doesn't apply now, but I liked it!) - Yes, bt I would convince him that Brian May's hair had to go....

8) What colour is January? - Blue

9) Have you ever heard voices in your head? - Nope

10) Why did you get so fat? - To pad out the wrinkles

11) Did you ever have a rocking horse when you were a child? - No

12) Do you think that Antiques Roadshow is boring? - Hell no!

13) Can you think of a good poem about Wet Wet Wet? - Not a good one

14) Have you ever milked a cow? A pretend one

15) Have you ever thought you were a bus stop? Only sometimes

16) Have you ever owned an Austrian shepherd-boy puppet? I get a different one every month

17) If you were a kangaroo, what would you keep in your pouch? - Whatever I keep in my bag

18) Have you got any nice crockery? - No, but I have some tacky mugs

19) Do you know anyone called Tarquin? - No

20) Have you got a Ronald McDonald toothbrush? - No, he scares the hell out of me.

1) Do you empty your own hoover bag? Of course

2) Did you ever pass yor Cycling Proficiency test as a child? Nope!

3) What colour is happiness? Yellow! It is always yellow!

4) Does your mum play golf? God no!

5) Are you any good at potato sculptures? Never tried but I will give it a whirl this evening

6) Do you like sardines? on toast

7) If you were married to Freddie Mercury, would you let him keep the moustache? (yes I know this question doesn't apply now, but I liked it!) Yes its smart

8) What colour is January? Blue. Pale blue

9) Have you ever heard voices in your head? Only singing

10) Why did you get so fat? Cheeky!

11) Did you ever have a rocking horse when you were a child? No they are creepy!

12) Do you think that Antiques Roadshow is boring? No it's ace. Reminds me of my grandad

13) Can you think of a good poem about Wet Wet Wet? No I don't have the time

14) Have you ever milked a cow? No

15) Have you ever thought you were a bus stop? Not recently

16) Have you ever owned an Austrian shepherd-boy puppet? ha ha!

17) If you were a kangaroo, what would you keep in your pouch? biscuits

18) Have you got any nice crockery? Yes it is red and black

19) Do you know anyone called Tarquin? Nope

20) Have you got a Ronald McDonald toothbrush? No I am scared of clowns

1) Do you empty your own hoover bag?

Yes

2) Did you ever pass yor Cycling Proficiency test as a child?

No. I can't even ride a bike properly. I learnt when I was about 7 or 8 then stopped when I grew too big for my bike; tried to ride a bike again when I was 17 and Icouldn't do it anymore. Yeah, I see the irony.

3) What colour is happiness?

Raspberry pink

4) Does your mum play golf?

No.

5) Are you any good at potato sculptures?

Good enough to enter a competition, not good enough to win.

6) Do you like sardines?

No.

7) If you were married to Freddie Mercury, would you let him keep the moustache? (yes I know this question doesn't apply now, but I liked it!)

Yes.

8) What colour is January?

Yellow.

9) Have you ever heard voices in your head?

Yes.

10) Why did you get so fat?

?

11) Did you ever have a rocking horse when you were a child?

No, but I had a whole stable full of invisible ponies on the landing in my parents house.

12) Do you think that Antiques Roadshow is boring?

Yes.

13) Can you think of a good poem about Wet Wet Wet?

No.

14) Have you ever milked a cow?

Yes. I'm from Devon. It's mandatory.

15) Have you ever thought you were a bus stop?

No.

16) Have you ever owned an Austrian shepherd-boy puppet?

I don't know what that is. So no.

17) If you were a kangaroo, what would you keep in your pouch?

A joey. Obviously.

18) Have you got any nice crockery?

Yes. 100% worth getting married for.

19) Do you know anyone called Tarquin?

No, but wish I did!

20) Have you got a Ronald McDonald toothbrush?

No. I had a Tom and Jerry one with matching strawberry flavoured toothpaste.

1) Do you empty your own hoover bag? No (bagless)

2) Did you ever pass yor Cycling Proficiency test as a child? Yes

3) What colour is happiness? Yellow

4) Does your mum play golf? No, she plays bowls

5) Are you any good at potato sculptures? Never tried, but I doubt it

6) Do you like sardines? No

7) If you were married to Freddie Mercury, would you let him keep the moustache? (yes I know this question doesn't apply now, but I liked it!) Yes

8) What colour is January? Grey

9) Have you ever heard voices in your head? No

10) Why did you get so fat? ?

11) Did you ever have a rocking horse when you were a child? No ?

12) Do you think that Antiques Roadshow is boring? Yes

13) Can you think of a good poem about Wet Wet Wet? No

14) Have you ever milked a cow? Despite being the granddaughter of a farmer, no.

15) Have you ever thought you were a bus stop? Not when sober

16) Have you ever owned an Austrian shepherd-boy puppet? No

17) If you were a kangaroo, what would you keep in your pouch? Haribo

18) Have you got any nice crockery? Yes, kept for special occasions (whenever that will be)

19) Do you know anyone called Tarquin? No

20) Have you got a Ronald McDonald toothbrush? No

1) Do you empty your own hoover bag? Yes

2) Did you ever pass yor Cycling Proficiency test as a child? No

3) What colour is happiness? I suppose it must be pink

4) Does your mum play golf? No, but her next door neighbour does so she's a social member of the golf club

5) Are you any good at potato sculptures? Never done one. *writes on things to do list*

6) Do you like sardines? Nope

7) If you were married to Freddie Mercury, would you let him keep the moustache? (yes I know this question doesn't apply now, but I liked it!) No way, moustaches are scary

8) What colour is January? Blue

9) Have you ever heard voices in your head? Nope

10) Why did you get so fat? Cause I love chocolate too much

11) Did you ever have a rocking horse when you were a child? Nope, but I'd love one

12) Do you think that Antiques Roadshow is boring? Apart from if they find things that are worth millions

13) Can you think of a good poem about Wet Wet Wet? Not at the moment

14) Have you ever milked a cow? Nope. But I've milked a goat

15) Have you ever thought you were a bus stop? Not that I can remember

16) Have you ever owned an Austrian shepherd-boy puppet? Strangely I want one...

17) If you were a kangaroo, what would you keep in your pouch? Chocolate. But then it would melt, so might not be a good idea

18) Have you got any nice crockery? Yes, I like it anyway

19) Do you know anyone called Tarquin? Nope, I'm not posh enough

20) Have you got a Ronald McDonald toothbrush? Sadly not