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K
Beginner July 2010

Maid of honour versus chief bridesmaid?

Karen1980, 20 of August of 2009 at 11:10 Posted on Planning 0 10

Please can someone help me a little here I would be very grateful.

A close friend and my sister are my bridesmaids.

My close friend is married but in the process of seperating.

Would she still be classed as maid of honour? and if so would my sister then be bridesmaid as opposed to chief bridesmaid (as there is only 2?) if that makes sense?

Thanks in advance!!

10 replies

Latest activity by Benjamin, 10 of February of 2024 at 08:37
  • shoegal01
    Beginner October 2010
    shoegal01 ·
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    I have no idea, never had!

    I am having 2 bridesmaids and calling them just that. Im not bothering with calling them CBM or MOH.

    I think MOH is someone who is married so your close friend would still be called that and your sister would be CBM - why dont you just call them both BM to save the confussion!

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  • K
    Beginner July 2010
    Karen1980 ·
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    Thats a good idea since my friend may not be still married by then and as my sister isnt the greatest fan of my close friend (because she's loud) having presents with bridesmaid on them for both would help to ease any ill feeling on my sisters part.. well i hope at least!! unless of course she expects to be recognised more than my close friend but thats a bit hard when there are only two of them!!

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  • Bridget Gump
    Bridget Gump ·
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    It really makes no difference what you call them, to be on the dafe side I'd just call them your BMs.

    I was my friends CBM/MOH last year, but tbh I was her only BM so it's not like I was picked out over the others.

    It's more a way of returning the favour to her, I think it means something to her too. She doesn't have any extra role or wearing anything different (well actually she is, but they are all wearing slightly different dresses)

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  • HatTrick
    Beginner September 2010
    HatTrick ·
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    Sorry to butt in on your thread but I'm confused about this too. I'm having 6 bridesmaids (5 younger girls and 1 older who is my best friend). She is calling herself my maid of honour, but I thought you could only be maid of honour if you were married?? Im confused. Is she just my cheid bridesmaid then? x

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  • Bridget Gump
    Bridget Gump ·
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    I think maid of honour = unmarried, matron of honour = married.

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  • jem179
    Beginner May 2010
    jem179 ·
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    What SK said

    You're a maid if you're unmarried and a matron if you're married.

    But an MOH is more of an American tradition, the British equivalent is chief bridesmaids so they're the same thing.. (at least that's what I've always been told...........)

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  • T
    thirteentreasures ·
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    Yep, you two are right. Matron of Honour is married (maid literally means virgin in this context!). Maid of Honour is an American term and Chief Bridesmaid is our equivalent though of course lots of people use Maid of Honour here now. In my mother's day (married in 1960) a Matron of Honour didn't dress like the bridesmaids but might have a co-ordinating outfit that was a bit like what a wedding guest would wear. My aunt was my mother's Matron of Honour and had a short, fitted dress that co-ordinated with the bridesmaids who had long dresses with puffy skirts. My aunt also wore a short veil, which was common for a Matron of Honour and sometimes even for bridesmaids at the time.

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  • teeheeyoucrazyguys!
    teeheeyoucrazyguys! ·
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    And those veils were the original fascinators of their day......

    thats what a fascinator was. My mum used to be a milliner and she used to talk about fascinators and be refering to small pill box hats with veils or bands with veils.......not the half a dead bird on an aliceband which is the norm now! lol

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  • Mrs S*
    Beginner January 2010
    Mrs S* ·
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    I decided to sod that idea! My 2 big bridesmaids are my big bridesmaids, I can't pick one over the other! And my little one is a princess (my niece, she doesn't know what a bridesmaid is, but she get's princess so we're sticking with that!) x

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  • lisaloulou
    Beginner
    lisaloulou ·
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    I really don't get the whole CBM/MOH/BM thing. One of my friends made such a huge deal about how one of her BMs was her CBM. She didn't do or wear anything different. I had 4 adult BMs and although two of them were more involved and "useful" than the others I didn't feel as if I should call them CBM/MOH.

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  • Benjamin
    Beginner May 2025 Lincolnshire
    Benjamin ·
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    Maid of honour if they are not married and matron of honour if they are.
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