Thanks for your suggestions ladies,
Leelee85 - i will definitely go through the list of recommended suppliers more thoroughly and see if they can do Caribbean catering, the venues we have looked at so far all are in partnership with a company called Jenkins and their food looks beautiful but not what we want. It's all too British! (if that makes sense- don't mean to offend anyone!)
Can i also just clarify that you mean DRY and not DIY? If so i have never heard of dry hire before but that is definitely an option and doing everything myself shouldn't be a problem as i am very fussy and want everything to look just how i want it! haha and to be as personalised as possible.
mrsh2b89 - yes i looked at Rodbaston Hall a couple of years ago when my sister was getting married (not looked for myself) and although it was beautiful once you got to the house, i wasn't overly keen on the entrance and drive up to the property. Again maybe me being over fussy and i need to learn to compromise on what its more important!
Thanks for the suggestions on Sandon Hall and Pimhill Barn, i will definitely look into those.
Scottish_Sarah - thank you, i think you are right i do need to look outside the box a bit more, in fairness i have only really started the search and have been hit by a couple of brick walls in connection to the catering issue at typical wedding reception venues and was feeling a little frustrated by the level of restrictions in place as we can't be the only people who want a nice fancy reception venue but don't want run of the mill catering. Not being a wedding venue itself shouldn't be a problem either as we will be having a church ceremony so will not need to be licensed for weddings.
Thanks feeling a little bit more upbeat.