I think I've just left my husband

MaisieMoo30
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  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 7:28

    I think I've just left my husband

    Some of you may remember my post a month or so back about the texts/emails i found on H's phone with a girl at work? Really belueved him when hecsaid he was sorry and it was just banter etc. Well he was out last night and i got a gut feeling something wasnt right when he rolled in at 11.45pm on a Tuesday and lo and behold more texts. Only worse this time. Him telling her she "looked beautiful tonight" and how he would need "more" than her offer of coffee to get him through today. 

    I am gutted but not surprised. I have told him its over as far as i am concerned. He swears there is no affair but the intention is definitely there. If we were happy together he wouldn't have done it and to make it all worse i have to look at this skinny blonde *** every day at work knowing she wrecked our family. He has been crying saying he only wants me but i dont trust him anymore and dont think i ever will.

    We haven't been getting on for years. He would rather be at the gym than spend time at home. We have "tried again" at least 5 times before this girl came on the scene. She is just whats bought it all to a head.

    So i have a 3 year old, i am pregnant (17 weeks) and have a mortgage i wont be able to pay on my own. What the hell happens next??

  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 7:35

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    Don't want to read and run as on way to work but firstly huge hugs. Your h is an idiot:( There is a few hitchers in the same boat hopefully they will be along soon with some advice. Xxx

  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 7:46

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    I'm sending a huge hug, I have no wise words to share, but couldn't R&R.

    Are you in work today? If so, can you call in sick?

    I am so sorry that you have found yourself in this situation. As for the questions, I think if it were me, i'd give myself today at least to get my head around what has happened and let the news sink in, then you can address these other issues tomorrow.

  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 7:48

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    Oh no M Hug I think a bit of space on both parties will help. You both really need to think about what you want. Remember you have extra hormones whizzing around- not that I'm saying you can't make a decision but I know I often get the rage then feel a bit different once iv had time to process everything. Are you staying with family or has he gone? I would ask for some space then come together to talk abou where you go from there cx

  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 7:48

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    Thank you. I have a consultant's appointment this morning and cant see me going to work after as they will both be there. I am then off till Monday anyway. So not only has he ruined our family but he's made work virtually impossible too.

  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 7:50

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    Hi MS. I have asked him to stay at his mum's but he is still here. I just need some space Cry

  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 7:50

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    Do you all work together? If I were to give him another chance I would be making him start job searching pronto x

  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 7:51

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    MaisieMoo30:

    Hi MS. I have asked him to stay at his mum's but he is still here. I just need some space Cry

    Oh you poor thing why won't he go? Can you go somewhere? 

     

  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 7:52

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    I am a little lost for words MM, but I do hope someone with more experience can come along. Hug

    I agree with MissusS though, space is a definate must, has he stated any intention to move/leave? I am assuming this is all very very new with it happening very late last night.

     

  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 8:10

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    I want him to go but he wont. He thinks a hug will make it all ok. If he refuses to go i guess i will have to...

  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 8:11

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    I would def get yourself away from the situation. If anything to make him realise he can't just do a bit of grovelling and all is forgiven. He might sense the enormity of the situation. Even a couple of days to clear your head and let him stew x

  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 8:13

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    So sorry to read this! How awful and awkward. The least he could do is give you space! Inadequate hugs.
  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 8:17

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    I'm so sorry to hear this, men are such idiots.

    It sounds like you are going to have to leave if he wont. You wont get space otherwise and you fall in to the trap of things just ticking along as normal and him thinking everything will just be OK.

    Hope you get some time and space to think what you want properly xxx

  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 8:17

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    I don't know what to say! What a knob he is. 

    Space is definitely the way to start Hug

  • Posted: 28 Nov 2012 8:22

    Re: I think I've just left my husband

    Oh MM, I'm so sorry.  I think he needs to respect your wishes for some time apart and go to his mams so you can think things through.  You must be so hurt that he said he was sorry and has done it again.  I think I would feel the same in your position, the intention is definately there.  How would he feel if he saw texts like that on your phone.

    What an awful position to be put in at work.  I'm so sorry you are going through this.  I have no idea about the mortgage but I'm sure someone will be able to help x

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