Hen do - invited people I don't know?!

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  • Posted: 24 Oct 2018 23:58

    Hen do - invited people I don't know?!

    Hi all, I wasn't sure what forum to write in, hope this ones ok. 

    So my hen do is in Jan and I have invited a number of people as you do... my close friends step mum and friend were in the list and the friend (who I have met a few times &a I invited for friends step mum) invited her own friend who I do not know and her son... who she said would be fine as he was gay. 


    However I do not know these two people? I've said to my friends organising I didn't really want them coming as I don't know them. Do you think this is wrong? 

    They invited them without saying anything until they discussed booking for the 4 of them. 


    I just feel bad now as the friend has said shes now not going to come and the step mum obviously wont fly out on her own as they live away from us so would of used a different airport. 

    Im a worrier but surely you don't just invite people on a hen that the hen doesn't know? 


    Thank you for reading Ash x

  • Posted: 25 Oct 2018 9:26

    Re: Hen do - invited people I don't know?!

    Don't feel bad. 

    A) It's your hen do, not just a random night out - it's meant to be people you know and love coming to celebrate the fact that you're getting married. 

    B) Why do they want to come to the hen do of someone they don't even know?! I wouldn't - that's just weird! 

    C) How rude of the person who invited them! I'd be tempted to bin her too! 

    Stick to your guns, and say that it is your hen do and you only want your close family and friends there. If they never speak to you again, who cares? They've never spoken to you before either!

    I hope this helps! X

  • Posted: 25 Oct 2018 10:59

    Re: Hen do - invited people I don't know?!

    I completely agree it is weird to have people there you don’t know unless you invite someone from H2Bs family that you don’t know. That’s the only time I can think you would invite someone you don’t know! Also if I went to someone’s hen I would also expect to be at their wedding so potentially having them at the hen could open you up to this too? Very strange that they just invited extra people...

  • Posted: 25 Oct 2018 15:39

    Re: Hen do - invited people I don't know?!

    You're completely in the right, and have probably handled the situation better than I would have! I'm struggling with my hen as it is because obviously I'm not planning it and I openly admit I'm a huge control freak. 


    If someone I'd put on the invite list invited additional people I don't know, I'd go mental, especially as said above, people assume that if they attend the hen or stag that they'll be invited to the main day, and for our wedding we're restricted on numbers and are already technically over our limit, but the venue aren't counting the babies as guests. 


    It's so incredibly rude that they invited people you don't know, I can't believe anyone would think that was ok!

  • Posted: 25 Oct 2018 16:25

    Re: Hen do - invited people I don't know?!

    If the 4 of them want to have a holiday together that's fine.  Let them book their own.  How bizarre!  

  • Posted: 26 Oct 2018 14:08

    Re: Hen do - invited people I don't know?!

    IMO inviting you friend's step mum was a stretch in itself and very kind of you! Her friend's friend's son is absolutely ridiculous! Really weird and rude behaviour. I cannot imagine my mum saying to me, "hey, a friend of a friend's step daughter is getting married, do you fancy crashing her hen do? Weird and rude.

  • Posted: 26 Oct 2018 19:37

    Re: Hen do - invited people I don't know?!

    Hey all thank you for your reply! I'm feeling better about it now and feel like I have definitely made the right choice. 

    I also like to have control in plans and I have none as it's a surprise from my close friends it's also my 30th weekend so all in all a very good weekend it will be I think 😊


    Thank you again! 

    Ash x

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