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Unrealistic Future-Husband To Be!

2020-bride, 17 of February of 2018 at 17:27 Posted on Planning 0 16

Hi all,

So we went ahead and put the deposit down and secured our wedding venue for 25th June 2020. I have started to look at cake makers, florists, photographers etc and I have found 3 definite providers that I really like.

However when I have showed my partner he likes them also but when it comes down to discussing the price he's not so keen.. He thinks everything is very expensive and I'm not sure he quite realises the price of things nowadays..

So what is everyone looking to spend in on certain things like so we can see who is being unrealistic.

I have found a photographer who is £1700, + £300 for an additional one that is for 9 hours roughly from bridal/groom prep up until first dance.

Cake - from £575

Florist from £1500, for bouquets, button holes etc

We have got as far as entertainment, props, bridal hair/makeup, suits, bridesamaid dresses yet but those would also be appreciated!

Thank you

16 replies

Latest activity by SoonToBeMrsC2018, 31 of March of 2018 at 12:54
  • L
    Beginner September 2018
    LuxuriousYellowFlowers63032 ·
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    I think the prices can differ based on whereabouts in the country you are.

    I'm based in Leeds/Harrogate our cake is 3 tiers, chocolate sponge decorated with belgian chocolate and finished with chocolates around the edge and on top it's costing £385 including delivery.

    The photographer we've booked is £850 but not staying all day they're quite local so are going away during the breakfast and coming back to photograph the first dance & cake cutting. That includes a usb stick with all photos and an album. If we had chosen a package over £850 it would have included an additional photographer.

    Haven't finalised flowers yet but based on prices I've seen at wedding fairs and online I've budgeted £250- £300 - again that will depend on the number of bouquets and buttonholes you require. (I'm wanting bride, 2 x flowergirl, 2 mum corsages, groom, best man & 7 guest button holes)

    We are trying to keep costs as low as possible but my other half has struggled to get his head around all the additional costs involved.

    Not sure if this helps as all my costs are much lower than yours. I know some photography packages we looked at went up to £1500 region but this was way over our budget.

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  • MetalBride
    Beginner April 2018
    MetalBride ·
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    My photographer is £1600, the venues one was £1,090 including canapés, the other is £2,250. Your flower quote seems very expensive, I'd look elsewhere for those. I managed to get BM dresses in the sale they were £30 each but they should have been £145 each. Bands between £250 to £400 each, DJ not sure. Suits were £130 each, we bought these, paid £15 each for shirts and another £7 each for ties. My hair is costing £35 I'm doing my own makeup.

    Hope this helps.

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  • P
    Beginner September 2018
    pooksgirl ·
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    I'm in the east midlands near Nottingham, these are what we've got booked so far/budgeted

    Photographer - 545 for all day - 1 shooter, no album, online gallery and I think a USB is an extra £50ish

    Cake - 80 cupcakes, plus 8in vanilla sponge, cake stand to hire, delivery and set up £225 - this is by the mum of our best man so may have a bit of a discount

    Florist - waiting for quote back but budget £200ish for brides bouquet, BM bouquet, 2 mums corsages and 4 buttonholes.

    Got to go out now, will update with more later!

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  • F
    Beginner November 2018
    Fireworkandfairylightwedding ·
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    I am also in the East Midlands/ Notts area, getting married out of season on a Saturday in November. I’ve not booked all of the following, but all of the below are my best quotes for each:

    cake: £270 for 3 trier cake (choc, vinilla and toffee) plus 100 mini, iced cupcakes

    florist: £170 for bridal bouquet, BM bouquet, groom + 5 button hole, top table arrangement and flowers for centerpieces (all fresh flowers)

    Photographer: £700 for all day coverage and videography with 1hr edited video

    In terms of entrainment so far I’ve booked:

    Hair and makeup: £200 for brides hair and (airbrush) makeup with trial’s and BM and motb hair and makeup on the day.

    Fireworks: £1000 for 10 min display

    magic mirror booth: £325 for 4 hours including guest book

    dj: £300 booked through the venue

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  • F
    Beginner November 2018
    Fireworkandfairylightwedding ·
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    I am also in the East Midlands/ Notts area, getting married out of season on a Saturday in November. I’ve not booked all of the following, but all of the below are my best quotes for each:

    cake: £270 for 3 trier cake (choc, vinilla and toffee) plus 100 mini, iced cupcakes

    florist: £170 for bridal bouquet, BM bouquet, groom + 5 button hole, top table arrangement and flowers for centerpieces (all fresh flowers)

    Photographer: £700 for all day coverage and videography with 1hr edited video

    In terms of entrainment so far I’ve booked:

    Hair and makeup: £200 for brides hair and (airbrush) makeup with trial’s and BM and motb hair and makeup on the day.

    Fireworks: £1000 for 10 min display

    magic mirror booth: £325 for 4 hours including guest book

    dj: £300 booked through the venue

    • Reply
  • P
    Beginner September 2018
    pooksgirl ·
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    Right I'm back!

    I didn't say in my previous post is we are getting married on a Sunday in September since day of the week and time of year can also hugely influence costs. We chose a Sunday because it was less expensive - If we had the same package below on a Saturday it would be £3800

    We are working to numbers of 40 daytime guests and 100 evening, but likely to be less for both.

    Other costs that I have are:

    Definite costs - already paid/agreed

    Dress from local bridal store - Phoenix Gowns GR5001 was £996 - this was paid for my parents, alternations to be done once dress comes in but the store has a cap £150

    Shoes - £79 from irregular choice but again was a gift

    invites 20 of each - day invites, RSVP cards, and guest info cards - £52 from optimal print who had a 50% sale on

    rings - both from Ernest Jones mine is 9ct white gold with 7 small diamonds was £170 which included a 20% discount and 3years warrenty and his was £75 for titanium

    Registrar fee/ceremony will be £420

    Notice is £75

    actual licenses are £4 each and I'm probably going to get 3/4 just in case need copies for anything so I've got £12 budgeted as it costs more if you need copies in the future rather than on the day

    Now for the actual venue, we are using a local hotel that is a listed building dating back to Charles I. We have a package which is £3650 (this is actually based on 40day/100evening as I mentioned but I doubt we will have that many so will get final price when give final numbers)

    In that £3650 though it includes the following:

    civil ceremony room

    suite for us the night of wedding with four poster bed £150

    3 course wedding breakfast (£30ph =£1500)

    half bottle of wine per person (£9 per half bottle= £450)

    Sparkling wine toast (£4 pp = £200)

    Buffet for 100 in evening (£10pp = £1000)

    Disco £200

    All linen crockery etc are included as well.

    We've got a room booked at the hotel for me for the night before the wedding which is £150 b&b

    All of that is the £3650

    Tea & Coffee & Mints after wedding breakfast is £2 pp and will be charged on how many people actually order it so will be billed afterwards.

    What we've got left to sort and finalise costs for are:

    Suits - but looking to be about £100 each just need to decide if going to buy or hire, have got 2 fathers, groom and best man. Fathers and best man are paying for their own.

    Grooms shoes - £50

    my lingerie specifically a strapless bra I've got £50-60 down but hopefully less but I'm large up top so can't just going to the local marks and sparks

    Hair and Make up - I've not looked at this massively but I'm hoping under £200 for both for mine, his mum wants her hair doing and I'm going to offer my BM if she wants hers doing.

    BM dress - she's paying (our Best man and BM are a couple so for gifts we are going to pay for their room to stay over the night of the wedding which is £115)

    Veil/Hair decoration - not a clue what I'm doing with these yet but I don't want to pay more than £50

    Evening invites - probably going to use a facebook event to invite people for this - I know some will look down at this, but we know our crowd and they will be fine with it. So no charge there. I may get some of the ready to write invites for evening guests but I think I can get them for £20.

    Venue decoration/centrepieces - this is partly depend on the florist quote but I'm not sure what I'm doing vases wise. I like those fishbowl vases but I need to figure out how many I need, or I may collect used jars/bottles to use. March is my month to play around and try different things

    Favours - again still to be decided.

    Overall I'm aiming for a total budget of £6000 which I think it going to be pretty much on target (Famous last words!)

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  • M
    Beginner October 2018
    Meg101 ·
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    I'm in the south east. It depends what you're after. We really wanted a great venue so we're paying £4900 for ours plus £2500 for caterer. The flowers are £600, photographer £1200 and we're getting a supermarket cake as we're not that fussed about that. I'm also doing my own invites and decorations to keep costs down where I can.

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  • R
    Beginner April 2018
    RomanticBlueCakes716 ·
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    What about a band or DJ and cars?

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  • G
    Beginner May 2019
    GinAndBling ·
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    Hi - where are you getting your flowers from please? Leicestershire bride here!

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  • 2
    2020-bride ·
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    I was looking at The White Horse Flower Company, but as others have mentioned they do seem expensive starting form £1500, and they are in Newbury (south east) however, they are lovely Smiley smile

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  • M
    Mum-of-bride ·
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    Is he unrealistic or just worried about the cost? Have you actually set a budget for your wedding?

    If you can afford to pay the prices you are quoting, then perhaps prove to him the prices are fair by providing 3 quotes for each service/item.

    I think the costs involved in holding a wedding are surprising when you first start to plan, and costs can vary widely so research is key.

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  • M
    Mum-of-bride ·
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    Is he unrealistic or just worried about the cost? Have you actually set a budget for your wedding?

    If you can afford to pay the prices you are quoting, then perhaps prove to him the prices are fair by providing 3 quotes for each service/item.

    I think the costs involved in holding a wedding are surprising when you first start to plan, and costs can vary widely so research is key.

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  • F
    Savvy August 2019
    Fairy5 ·
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    Yeh I agree, give him other quotes to prove what all this stuff costs for a wedding.

    I'm in Essex and we are paying around £1500 for 2 photographers, USB incl and online gallery.

    Cake - approx £255 incl. discount for naked cake

    Florist - I don't have a quote yet but I imagine around £1000 for 3 bouquets, 7 buttonholes, table flowers and jars for the aisle (Fiance wants gyp everywhere because it's so cheap!)

    Band - £2000 for evening and we will be adding daytime acoustic on which is another £400

    Caterer - £3400 for canapes, starter, main and evening food

    Ice cream truck for dessert - £320

    Registrar - £575

    Venue - £5300

    BYO Alcohol and open bar - approx £3000

    That's basically as far as I have got for next year but my OH was exactly the same, saying can't we get this cheaper or that cheaper etc. Until I started to show him multiple quotes he assumed I was looking at the most expensive suppliers. He's now got over the cost and agreed to suck it up because we can't really do it another way. My younger sister got married abroad and it's just not for me so it was either this or Vegas and invite no one!

    Oh BM dresses - Dorothy Perkins have just released a range and they look like they might be ok and come in different colours. Reasonable cost too!

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  • DavidAdamsPhotography
    DavidAdamsPhotography ·
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    My standard advice for budgeting includes the following:

    1) You might be happier by skipping something rather than skimping on something else - for example, if you love flowers, spend money on those and skip hiring cars completely.

    2) Spend more on things that last, less on things that will be gone and/or forgotten within days (or minutes!).

    3) Favours, decorations, personalised name tags, napkins, trinkets and such like are the things many people overspend on (see #2 above).

    4) Young people remember the dancing more than they remember the food. And few people beyond the couple remember the venue, in reality. A good photographer can create beautiful images wherever the wedding is; people worry too much about the venue in my opinion and it does tend to be the biggest cost.

    5) Some people say if money is tight then invite fewer people and there is good sense in that, but a wedding is all about celebrating with people, so I'd say one less glass of wine and including everyone you want to invite is probably a better way to go.

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  • H
    Beginner
    HappyRedHair16367 ·
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    Hey there, I think a good starting place is to list the top 3 most important things you each want to get out of the wedding. Sometimes it helps clarify what areas you want to spend on and what areas you don't mind spending less. And if your lists don't match it can also help the other understand why you might want to spend on certain items.

    I'm getting married in SW London on a Saturday in August with an anticipated 140 day guests and 30 evening guests. Most guests will be coming from abroad, so our priority is making sure that we provide them with plenty of food, drink, and fun. It made less sense to us to spend our money on a venue fee or decorations and more on the experience.

    Website, Save-the-dates, invites - £30; did everything online because it was more practical/cost saving with the # of international guests

    Welcome drinks - £1300; Hosting a 2.5 hr drinks at a pub nearby the hotel the night before the wedding

    Transport - £425; shuttle bus to ferry people from the reception back to the hotel for 3 hours. And rather than book a car for 2/3 days for a couple of short rides, we're booking executive cars from Addison Lee (Mercedes or similar) for drives to the church/hotel. Also includes 3 large vans to take famlly from hotel to church

    Attire - £1640; bought wedding dress secondhand because it wasn't a priority to have a "dream" dress. The rest is suit hires for 5 + ties for the ushers. No bridesmaids and in the US, they buy their own anyways.

    Hair & MU - £440; travel costs, trial, and H/MU for bride, MOH, and MOB

    Flowers - £335; Bride and MOH bouquets, 5 corsages, 12 buttonholes, flower girl headpiece, cake topper

    Church - £870; organist, all the paperwork, and cases of prosecco for glass at church post-ceremony

    Venue - £300

    Catering - £9,500; venue hire, bar extension, DJ, canapes, welcome drinks, dinner, dessert, wine, toast drink, evening snack, open bar (doesn't seem common here, but pretty standard in the US)

    Cake - £65; We're pie folk, so the venue allowed us to customize our 3rd course, so instead of individual plated desserts, they're going to make sweet pies that we'll have on a pie cart. We're going to buy a small cake from Hummingbird Bakery to cut. I've also heard of people who have a small display cake for cutting, with a bigger sheet cake behind the scenes that is cut and served to guests.

    DJ - £200; house DJ with the venue

    Chair hire - £495; cost less than chair cover/sash hire and saved the headache of trying to do ourselves, negotiated a discount

    Decorations - £160; entrance decorations, Post Box table, guest book, table plan

    Centrepieces - £200; easy to assemble and easily thrown out at the end of the night. Didn't care about floral or fancy ones because who really remembers centrepieces? But when we did get a quote from a florist, I think it was about £500 for 14 centrepieces

    Wedding favours - £75; mason jars with customized label. You can always find interesting ideas scouring pound stores, Wilko etc.

    Photographer - £1,120

    Videographer - £650; paid upfront to get a 20% discount

    Hope that helps!

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  • S
    Beginner August 2018
    SoonToBeMrsC2018 ·
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    I think the area you're in will massively impact on prices... we're getting married in the Cotswolds, which is typically quite pricey.

    This doesn't include our venue or food/drink costs, but, I hope this helps!

    • Legal fee's - £560 for Booking Fee (£40), Amendment Fee (£30 - we changed dates), Notice of Marriage (£70), Marriage at Approved Venue Fee (£420)
    • Photographer - £1700 for two photographers, 10 hours, engagement shoot + 1 x album
    • Photo Booth - £350 for four hours
    • Florist - £700 for 1 x bridal bouquet, 4 x bridesmaids bouquets, 1 x jnr bridesmaid bouquets, 9 x button holes, confetti for 60 people, 60ft basic garland, roses for the memorial table, display for the fireplace in the barn, flowers for the cake and an elaborate greenery and fairy light wrought iron hanging ring (under which we'll do our first dance).
    • Cake - £400 for three tiers, semi-naked with macaroons. Enough to feed 110.
    • Hair and Makeup - Around £620 for hair and makeup for five (me + four bridesmaids).
    • Band - £800 for a 5pc band who will provide a DJ set in-between their two one hour sets
    • Groom - £500 for FH's suit (plus tailoring), shirt, shoes and bow-tie
    • Groomsmen - £220 for 4 x suit hire from Burton + £30 for bow ties
    • Bridesmaids - £180 for 4 x Chi Chi London dresses (in sale + using discount code). Will probs need to pay for shoes
    • Jnr Bridesmaid - £50 for 1 x Chi Chi London dress
    • Flowergirl - £65 for 1 x Monsoon dress (in sale) + 1 x shoes from Debenhams + 1 x monsoon cardigan (eBay, brand new) and 1 x flower crown (etsy)
    • Bride - Approx. £2000 for dress, alterations, underwear and shoes. Veil was £70 from Etsy and earrings were £40 from Debenhams. Both were gifts.
    • Stationary - £400. Definitely my biggest splurge, but I love wedding invites and STD's.
    • Website - £0. FH built it from scratch, can totally recommend Wix though.
    • Decor - I'd say we've spent probably around £400 by the time it's all said and done. We used Facebook a lot - for candles, easel's, ladders etc. A lot we're DIYing (like signs - my current weekend project). But that £400 covers everything, our tables, guest book, s'mores, place cards, aisle decor, signs etc.
    • Hotels - Around £700 when we're all said and done. That's for 2 x nights hotel for my brother and his partner, 3 x bridesmaids and 2 x groomsmen (the others chose to pay for their own rooms as they wanted to stay somewhere specific)
    • Transport - Around £30. We're not doing anything fancy, will just get a taxi. Our venue is a 12 min drive from our hotel and it's all in one place - the lowest quote we had for a 12 minute drive in a 'wedding' car was like £250. Nope.
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