I am going to wake up in a minute aren't I? UPDATE on Page 4 Warning- #dadcancer

Oh man, I'm so sorry. There's nothing I can say to make it better but have a weird internet hug. We're all here for you (not that I expect anyone else to be up at this time!) Stay strong x

I am so sorry to read this and to hear about what you and your family are going through. My thoughts are with you all. There is nothing I can say that will make anything better but we are all here for you. Sending internet hugs your way xx

Just a huge hug from a stranger. All I can echo are the other ladies, we're here for you if you need to offload. Your parents know how much you care, and they clearly care for you too, just be there when you can be, however you can, phone, as well as in person xx

Im so sorry you are going through this. My thoughts are with you and your family

I couldn't read and not comment but I have nothing to say that will make any of this better. Just know that I'm thinking of you and sending a virtual hug xx

Oh what sad and worrying news and times for you. Try to stay as positive as you can. Although it sounds like your dad has had a clear diagnosis, wait until the drs etc have met to decide the next course of action etc. I do know how difficult this all is, I went through this with my mum and you feel everything is on hold. You're also sad, scared etc etc. there's nothing anyone can say to make things better, but we are thinking of you.

I'm so sorry to hear this, I don't know what say other than to offer support through hitched the same as everyone else. x

Oh my goodness. I am so terribly sorry. You dont need this and it shouldn't be happening to you.

Is there absolutely nothing they can do. My 54 year old cousin was diagnosed with bowel cancer in February. He's had the cancer removed and has a stoma bag. He's waiting to see if it's spread but he's home and is looking forward to living.

My ex husband was diagnosed with liver/ gall bladder cancer almost two years ago. He was told he had four months but he's still here.

You are in shock mode right now but when everything has calmed down there are lots of alternate things your dad can be doing. There's an awful lot out there. Attention to diet is a start. Supplements such as IP- 6 and graviola have found to be useful.

Juicing, particularly green juices are very good

Theres a wealth of information on here

http://www.davidicke.com/forum/showthread.php?t=79354

Pits an old thread but a good one. Cancer doesn't have to be a death sentence..

Pand another

http://www.davidicke.com/forum/showthread.php?t=37738

One of the things your dad must do is to get his body back to alkaline

Also get him to do some meditation using harmonic solfeggio tones. Just look on you tube. These tones help to heal or DNA

Theres a wealth of alternative/ complimentary stuff out there and it's all about making changes. It takes a long time to get our bodies acidic so the change won't happen overnight but I would throw every good thing at it I could.

My ex saw his 60th birthday last week, something he didn't expect.

Also it would help to get your dad to a homeopath .

Where does he live?

Dont cancel your wedding. He won't want you to do that.

I am so sorry you are having a rough time. Dont cancel your wedding. That is probably the one positive thing he and your family have to look forward too.

I am so shocked it took a lot of mis-diagnosis to actually get to the bottom of what is wrong with him :-(

Get a second opiniom about what can be done, you never know. We are very fortunate to have the reaearch we do on cancer.

As for making it to your wedding, he may have to watch from a distance if he is bed bound. Depending on the severity he may able to make it. My grandpa had cancer and he was unable to make my aunties wedding, but he watched via Skype, and he didnt miss a thing. He joined us again later for speeches.

I know you must be feeling shocked, vulnerable and just down right terrified, and that is Ok. Dont bottle it up, whether you let it all out on here, to your family or a random bloke behind a bar, do so.

Make sure you let work know ASAP, so they can expect you not to come in now and again, and may give you a little special leave to try and accept what is happening.

All the best, and I wish you and your dad all the luck in the world!!

I am so so sorry xxx

There's nothing any of us can say, but I am so, so sorry hun. Echoing that you should tell your work - they may have special leave you can take, at least until you meet with the Drs and know the full prognosis and treatment plan. it also sounds like you don't need to mention the wedding - its obviously foremost in his mind, too. For now I would confirm with the venue as if nothing's changed, it's all you can do. ((hugs))

Couldn't read and run. I'm so so sorry. There's nothing anyone can say or do to make this better I know, but you are in our hopes and thoughts, and surrounded by love and hugs from loved ones and strangers alike xxx

DeeBee I am so gutted to read this, I can't believe this is happening to your family. Take your time and let the news sink in, there will be lots of tests and options and news and information coming your way in the next weeks days/weeks, allow yourself to process it before you start thinking about the wedding. Take it all in bite sized chunks. A friend of mines mum recently became ill and although the prognosis is not good, it seems the shape of the story changes on a weekly basis as they learn more and different options open up to them.

Finally, talk lots. If you need a strangers ear to shout and scream in to then please by all means get in touch and use mine ..

I'm so sad to hear about this, sending you useless virtual hugs xxx

So so sorry to hear this......hugs xxx

Hello, I'm pretty new here and don't normally post but in this case I thought I may be able to offer a small bit of advice. I lost my mum earlier in the year to cancer. The absolute most important thing I did was be with her as much as I possibly could. Try and do this for your dad, speak to your own doctors if possible my sisters work wanted to let her be off work but needed a sick note to process it and our G.P. Sorted that for her. Get in touch with Macmillan, your dad will probably get assigned a Macmillan nurse who will be on hand to answer an questions you and your family have. Macmillan will also do everything they can to help your Dad get to the wedding. Speak with them, they could arrange a nurse to go with him for the journey if necessary. Other's have prepared you that it may not be possible of course but then you can look at Skype and your photographer may be able to quickly edit a bunch of photos you can take to show him the next day?

This is such a hard time for you and you're family, stick together and make sure you have someone to talk to. (Of course come on here to vent and even take your mind of things) My now fianace and I bought our house while Mum was in the hospice and we had to show her round by video link but she was just so happy to have seen where were going to be living. Keep your chin up and lean on your fiance and you know we are here if you need us.

This link will take you to the Macmillan website, they have loads of information and a freephone number for any questions you have until your dad gets advised who his Macmillan nurse is. One last thing, when they say there is nothing to be done, that doesn't always mean there is no treatment to prolong life slightly or even aid with pain. Mum had radiotherapy and steriods to keep her pain at bay before she deteriorated.

http://www.macmillan.org.uk/Home.aspx

I will be thinking of you and hoping the best for you and your family at this difficult time.

So sorry to hear this deebee.

Thank you everyone for your kind words and hugs, and all your advice and guidance. Am going home today but hopefully not for long if I can get things sorted with work. Just feels like a bad dream I need to wake up from.

Thanks again x

Amongst all the unfamiliar and scary and unpredictable stuff, your dad will be looking forward to the wedding. It may be what gives him his fight, so please do not think that your wedding becomes unimportant in the grand scheme of things.....it may have even become important if it gives him a reason to live. My dad died at 55 with no notice...a blood clot to the lung....so I cannot pretend I know what it is like for you right now as we only ever got the call to say it was too late. But....I do know how important dads and daughters are, and that will never change for you....use it to look forward, however things turn out.

Be strong, and take care of you x

....and make sure you eat properly, get rest when you can, and cry when you need.....and keep laughing too. It will all help keep your energy levels up to allow you to be there for him....you will be no use if you exhaust yourself.

Huge hugs... Didn't want to read and run, I can only echo what everyone else has said and you definitely need to stay strong and look after yourself, my dad sadly passed away almost 2 years ago to the same thing so I can relate somewhat. :'(

Take care xx

Thinking of you DeeBee xxx

Im so sorry, i cannot begin to even imagine it and feel devestated for you. Will be keeping you and your family in my thoughts as its truly dreadful. Keep holding on to the family love and hope your work is supportive x

Huge hugs deebee x

So sorry for you and thinking of you and your family xx

I am so so sorry to hear your awful news. My heart goes out to you and your family. My friends mum had bowel cancer and was being treated whilst her daughter got married. To ensure she could attend the wedding the hospital gave her what looked like a small bag which she strapped under her dress that contained medicine that she put in a tube. I'm not sure if this can be done under every circumstance but if he is undergoing any treatment/pain relief I would speak to the hospital and see what can be done to help him get there. I imagine he would not want you to cancel/postpone so my best advice would be to speak to a doctor and see what they can do to help. I'm sending you lots of internet hugs x

I am so sorry to read your post - that's horrendous.

I imagine your dad would not want you to cancel your wedding plans - could you speak to your mum about it.

You must feel like the ground has just collapsed from under you - unimagineable

xx

I'm so sorry to hear what you are going through.

There is really nothing I can say but my best wishes are with you and your family xx

My father was diagnosed with terminal cancer a few weeks after I got engaged the first time round. Despite being in a hospice and confined to a wheelchair by the time the (brought forward) wedding happened, he made it. He died 11 days later.

I've written about it on here before so I won't go into great detail and you don't need a post that's me me me anyway.

Just wanted to say I know exactly how you feel and that if you want to talk, please feel free to message me.

I'm so sorry. I have just been through very similar with my sister and I know how devastating it is. All I can say is that I am so glad we had our wedding, it was the last time we were all together and happy before a bomb went off in our family. The memories of the day are even more precious now. Keep planning, look forward, be together as much as you can xx

You have had far more helpful replies from others, I can't think lf anything to add that hasn't already been said, but I couldn't read and run. Sending you much love and huge hugs. Xxxx

Oh DeeBee, I am so sorry

I have no words. I wish I could help make it all go away.

We are all here if you need us. Sending you lots of internet hugs and will be thinking of you x

I am so sorry to read this. I don't think I can add anything helpful at this stage as I can't even begin to imagine what you must be going through. Just know that we will all be thinking of you. Big weirdy hugs xxx