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L
Beginner September 2015

Haven't enjoyed dress shopping :(

Laura0509, 18 of May of 2014 at 22:53 Posted on Planning 0 12

Hi all,

Just a random confused post but thought I'd share...I have my dress yey Smiley smile but it just feels weird. I feel like all my shopping experiences have been rushed and not at all what I expected it to be!

I started by trying on a dress at the London wedding show then returning to their shop to try on again along with 8 others, still unsure so booked to go to another shop, fell in love with another dress, tried on 8 here too but the lady in the shop was not nice at all (turns out when we left me, my mum and mil all thought the same) so didn't want to go back there, booked a third shop an hour away to try on same dress. This was yesterday...arrived at the shop they were lovely and had three rooms 'affordable' dresses, couture dresses and plus size dresses, the dress I wanted to try on was in the 'affordable' room so this is where I picked other dresses to try on. Upstairs they had Justin Alexander dresses which I love but never thought I could afford. Anyway I tried on the I love dress (from the other shop with not so nice lady) and it didn't feel the same so that was a no, then every dress I tried on had something I didn't like, the lovely shop assistant went upstairs to get me a JA dress I had asked to try on-didn't like it.So she went and picked me another JA dress which fitted the sort of thing I was looking for and was a style we had decided suited me. I loved it and stood there in it for ages (then we got champagne as that's obviously something they only give to clients who shop upstairs!) I still wasn't sure , maybe as the dress lacks sparkle. The lady asked me lots of questions then all of a sudden everyone was telling me it's definitely my dress, mum and sister joking around about me being fussy and not going shopping anymore-mum ready to pay deposit, wants me to have this dress as she loves it. Then before I know it I'm out of the dress and agreeing that this is the one and yes let's pay the deposit, all the while thinking I want to come back and try it one more time and have a proper look upstairs at the couture dresses. So now I have the dress which I do love but it feels weird I worry I've rushed my decision . I can't describe how I'm feeling maybe just really overwhelmed and a bit sad that my shopping experiences have not been how I expected them to be, not one feeling of wow I look great I'm in love bla bla bla!Just yes I like it let's go, I'm waffling now but it feels good to write it down haha! Shall I call the shop tomorrow and ask them to hold fire, maybe go with my best friend and try it on with her, don't know how it works as obviously my amazing mum has just paid for half the dress!Im so confused as I do love the dress but am having wobbles as it's a big commitment and I'm soooo rubbish at making decisions! Please give me your opinions or just tell me to shut up and stop being silly lol! So confused and overwhelmed by all of this!!

So sorry for this waffling ranty post, just figured I can do that here as you all give super advice!!

i will try to flash if I can figure out how to on my phone?!

xx

12 replies

Latest activity by ToBeMrsHouse, 19 of May of 2014 at 23:17
  • miss_winter14
    Beginner February 2014
    miss_winter14 ·
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    Odd question before i can offer any advice- was this store elderberry by any chance? xxx

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  • L
    Beginner September 2015
    Laura0509 ·
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    Me in the dress, the pic of back is from website as didn't fit me in the shop.xx

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  • L
    Beginner September 2015
    Laura0509 ·
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    Yes it was misswinter!How did you guess? I loved the shop was my best experience so far the shop assistant was fab I just can't shake this weird feeling!xx

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  • miss_winter14
    Beginner February 2014
    miss_winter14 ·
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    I know elderberry well- it's where mine came from.

    pam and the team are without question some of the best in their business.

    honestly the best advice i can give you is go back and talk to pam. ring the shop tomorrow so they can halt the order and get down and talk to pam.

    i'd personally go alone, so no one can influence your opinion. go back, talk through options and then when you've made a decision you're totally happy with take people back with you then.

    pam is the key here. her and the elderberry team. trust me xxx

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  • miss_winter14
    Beginner February 2014
    miss_winter14 ·
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    Oh and i have to say, i do like the dress and i think it looks lovely on you BUT it doesn't matter what i think or anyone else- it's down to you and your feelings.

    best of luck hun xxx

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  • L
    Beginner September 2015
    Laura0509 ·
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    Thankyou so much! Yes they are a brill team and really feel it's where I want to buy my dress! I am going to call them on my morning break tomorrow and go alone when they can fit me in. I will sleep well tonight now Smiley smile I will update when sorted. Thankyou xx

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  • miss_winter14
    Beginner February 2014
    miss_winter14 ·
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    Wishing you all the best. feel free to PM me here if i can help at all.

    honestly i wouldn't have dreamed of going elsewhere. everyone in my party loved pam and the team. even mr winter who met her- long story.

    i'm taking mini miss winter there and only there when she grows up and gets married so i told pam she needs to stay in the biz til then! Smiley winking

    sleep soundly hun- it'll all work out xxx

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  • J
    Beginner May 2014
    Jes22 ·
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    I too didn't have the best dress shopping experiences, I wanted something very plain and the shop assistants obviously don't understand this word lol I eventually found a completely plain dress (not one sparkle in sight) and ordered it, when it arrived there was something about it I just didn't like, turns out it was too plain oops. Anyways the staff were amazing and we tried adding all kinds of things onto it eventually agreeing on adding shoestring straps and a beautiful pearl and bead back piece. Even though I now liked my dress I never got the wow feeling until my wedding day, once your hair and makeup is done you feel a million times better and I slipped into my dress, I felt like a princess. Everybody complimented on it and if I must say so myself I looked beautiful.

    Anyway I'm waffling, follow what you think don't be pushed about but find something that makes you feel beautiful and don't forget once hair and makeup is done, it'll look a million times better xxx

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  • cinnamon009
    Beginner December 2014
    cinnamon009 ·
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    Just to reassure you I didn't get 'the one' feeling either. And I tried on LOTS. I love the dress I ended up buying but didn't like myself in any of the dresses I tried on including the one I have bought. For me I think there is something around looking at hundreds of pictures of stick thin models in these dresses and then looking at myself in them and just thinking 'ugh'. So I bought the dress that I felt best in and fitted with the look I wanted. I also feel disappointed and slightly cheated I didn't have that 'the one' feeling with tears etc. Maybe I will on the day.

    The dress is beautiful - what is it about it that you are having wobbles about? I would definitely go back and try on and discuss with the shop as they sound like they would be helpful. I went back on my own and it helped put my mind at rest that I had done the right thing as I still thought my dress was beautiful. Still have the wobbles regularly though around maybe I didn't try on enough. But the rational part of my brain knows I could have carried on looking for several years and never found a dress I thought 'wow' in. It wasn't anything to do with the dresses it was about me if that makes sense.

    If you want more bling you could always accessorise it - maybe a brooch bouquet, belt and other bling that will come together to create the look you are after.

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  • Paula @ Ollievision
    Paula @ Ollievision ·
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    Laura, is that photo of you in your dress? If so, then I agree with your mum. It's tasteful, elegant and flattering on you. Go for it!

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  • B
    Bruce Neville Photography ·
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    I love the dress, it really is a lovely dress but you have to be totally happy with it and agree with what miss_winter14 said above, oh and don't take anyone with you.?

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  • L
    Beginner September 2015
    Laura0509 ·
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    Just a little update! I phoned the shop they don't open on a Monday but have left a waffling message and hopefully they'll call back tomorrow, although I'm on a 12 hour shift so will have to try and sneak off at some point!

    Thanks for all your lovely comments and help...very glad I found this forum as there are some things your nearest and dearest just can't help with. Cinnamon009 I totally agree with what you said and have now decided the model on the website is far too thin and looks ridiculous (makes me feel better lol) I'm pretty sure it's the one for me and I could look for years and never get the feeling I'm waiting for, but am still going to go back on my own and have a nice calm experience in the shop and pick my shoes as they are a freebie Smiley smile I couldn't concentrate on picking shoes last time!

    Thanks again xx

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  • ToBeMrsHouse
    Beginner August 2014
    ToBeMrsHouse ·
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    Firstly, the dress is absolutely gorgeous!

    But also, I can empathise with your experience. Dress shopping for me was not the experience I expected. There was no initial 'wow, this is THE dress', no tears from my mum, etc. In fact I began having cold feet about my dress for a while (that's over now, I love it again). I think that finding 'THE' dress is on the whole a myth. I don't think I've ever felt like crying tears of joy simply because I've tried on a new outfit, so I don't know why I was expecting a wedding dress to be any different.

    My friend who is getting married soon is finding the same problem and having the same doubts.

    I think the dress has been the most difficult part of wedding planning for me - and that's saying something as our venue fell through earlier this year AND my parents don't get on AND the invitations still haven't been sent!

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