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Beginner June 2012

Ushers

ExcitedBride.com, 28 of July of 2011 at 10:44 Posted on Planning 0 14

How does the whole 'Usher' thing work?

My OH has a best man and we are paying for the suit etc, but I keep reading everywhere that Ushers are 'important'.

So are they really needed?

Do I need to pay for a suit for them also??

Cant my OH just have his friends (who will be in there own suits anyway) act as Ushers?

14 replies

Latest activity by vicster, 28 of July of 2011 at 14:35
  • N
    Beginner August 2011
    Noodle2Be ·
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    It's totally up to you. We're having 2 ushers, our brothers, and paid for the hire of their suits and we will be giving them jobs to do on the day. They are there to help the couple. If you've got people who you would like to include in the wedding then its a nice way of doing it.

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  • MissTtoMrsB
    Beginner August 2012
    MissTtoMrsB ·
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    We will be using our brothers (who will be in thier own suits) as ushers. We will just give them little jobs to do, between us we have 3 brothers plus the best man and we have 4 bridesmaids so i might get them to walk with the bridesmaids down the aisle. ?

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  • Knees
    VIP August 2012
    Knees ·
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    They're supposed to "usher" people to their seats. They are sometimes given a seating plan so that the important people are seated at the front and Grandma isn't seated behind uni mates etc. They hand out orders of service and provide directions to the reception venue if people don't know.

    Having said that, grooms tend to appoint ushers because they're friends that the groom wants to include in the bridal party. For example, OH has his best man and 4 ushers. There's no way we need 4 ushers to look after our relatively small number of guests, but he wanted to have his 3 brothers and my sister's husband.

    At our wedding, they will hand out orders of service, show people to their seats, gather people for photographs after the ceremony and lead them to the boat (to the reception venue) whilst we are off having photos.

    ETA - we will be buying their suits as OH wants them all to look the same. If you don't mind about that, then you don't have to.

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  • S
    Beginner August 2011
    syppox2000 ·
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    Our ushers are my brother and my h2b's brother in law. They are just wearing their own grey suits. We will use them to show people to seats, hand out order of services, confetti and generally just make sure all suppliers are fine. x

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  • ajdown
    VIP September 2011
    ajdown ·
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    In my book, Ushers are just as important as Bridesmaids.

    The chief bridesmaid is there to support the bride, and the bridesmaids support her.

    The best man is there to support the groom, and the ushers support him.

    Often on the day all the bridesmaids do is smile for photos, whereas the ushers do practical jobs such as handing out "order of service" or equivalent, show people to their seats, round people up for photos etc.

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  • Tray1980
    Beginner July 2013
    Tray1980 ·
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    And where did you get this lovely little generalisation from?

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  • M
    Beginner January 2010
    Mrs A to B ·
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    My bridesmaids did a hell of a lot more than just smile for the camera AJ and were probably more helpful on the day than all 4 of our ushers put together!!! When we asked our borthers to be an usher their first response was what does an usher do, when i asked my bridesmaids they didnt have to ask what their role was!

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  • vicster
    Beginner December 2011
    vicster ·
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    I would have said groomsmen were the equivalent of bridesmaid's and then ushers came next. we'll have one or two, probably brothers of mine and they'll show people to their seats at the venue while the best man and groomsman keep OH calm and happy Smiley smile

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  • navychick
    Beginner August 2011
    navychick ·
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    We aren't having ushers, but then, I don't have a CBM or MOH either.
    We're not having an order of service, and for the ceremony, we'll have named reserved seating for the first few rows for close family members and everyone else can sit wherever.
    We have a lady who is setting up our venue for us with the table decs, table plan etc, and her husband has offered to help guests out if need be.

    Each to their own, we just didn't feel the need for ushers, so didn't bother.

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  • Mrs C
    Beginner March 2011
    Mrs C ·
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    I am sure that you do this on purpose. That first part of your sentence was not necessary.

    As it happens, I had one chief bridesmaid, one best man, one flowergirl and no ushers. No problems either.

    Ushers generally are on hand to make sure people are in the right place at the right time.

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  • BespokeTailor
    BespokeTailor ·
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    I was an usher recently and seemed to get lumbered doing everything. I didn't mind I quite enjoyed the role. But still ushers do kind of pick up the slack on the day, just doing all those niggly little things others are too busy to deal with.

    Is it just me or does anyone else not like the expression 'groomsman' 'groomsmen' ?

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  • Knees
    VIP August 2012
    Knees ·
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    I think that's the American term for ushers. Makes sense really - bride's maids and groom's men. From what I've seen on TV and movies, the groomsmen tend to escort the BMs down the aisle, whereas I've never seen this happen in the UK.

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  • ajdown
    VIP September 2011
    ajdown ·
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    I don't either, it sounds too american for my liking.

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  • BespokeTailor
    BespokeTailor ·
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    Glad it's not just me.

    I have to discuss this American colloquialism most working days of my life, to be honest I have been bluffing for years beacuse until now I never knew exactly what a 'Groomsman' was. I had assumed it was an 'Usher' for those who thought 'Usher' was a singer.

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  • vicster
    Beginner December 2011
    vicster ·
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    I'm from Ireland and any wedding I've been to there there are groomsmen and ushers, and ya the groomsmen walk the bm's down the aisle. I always find it funny the differences in wedding practices between UK & Ire.

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