How to Handle a Bad Bridesmaid

See how you can turn your bad bridesmaid into a star member of your bridal party with these top tips

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You’re engaged, you have started planning your special day and you asked your most special girls 'Will you be my bridesmaid?'. So what happens if one of those close friends actually turns out to be the worst bridesmaid ever? We take a look at what you can do if you have a bad bridesmaid.

Bad Bridesmaid

Just because a friend is a bad bridesmaid doesn’t necessarily mean she is a bad friend, perhaps weddings just aren’t her thing or maybe she just hasn’t been a bridesmaid before and isn’t too clear on etiquette. 

Take a look at some of the most popular bridesmaid problems and see if your bad bridesmaid can be retrained into a standout member of your wedding party.

The Green Eyed Monster

She’s happy for you but every now and then her jealousy causes her to be negative about your wedding plans.

Sometimes even the greatest of friends can get a bad case of the green eyed monster. If you have gotten engaged before your BFF, jealousy can sometimes arise. If it’s just a mild case of jealously then it’s very likely it will pass but if bad behaviour continues then take the time to talk it through with her, she may just need a shoulder to cry on!

The Bridesmaid Dress Hater

You’ve spent weeks picking the perfect bridesmaid dress ideas but there is just one bridesmaid that hates every option you send.

Bad Bridesmaid

Part of a bridesmaid’s role is to wear the dress you have given her. Gone are the days of neon shades and puffy sleeves, there are so many gorgeous bridesmaid dresses out there that it should be easy to find a dress that will be perfect.

However, it’s hard to please absolutely everyone! If your bridesmaid has been quite vocal about not liking your dress ideas then talk it through with her. Does she have a body insecurity she is worried about? Is it the colour? Is it the fit? If you can find what she doesn’t like about the dress then it will be easier for you to decide whether to cater to your bridesmaid’s wish or to ask politely that she wear what she is told (eek!).

The Anti-Wedding Bridesmaid

This bridesmaid is one of your closest friends but when it comes to marriage, you have polar opinions.

We’ve all got those friends that post those e-cards about everyone else getting married except them (you know the ones!) and continually talk about how they never want to get married and they are perfectly entitled to do so. But if they are one of your closest friends and still can’t share in the excitement of what you have chosen to do, then sit down with them and explain how much your wedding day means to you. It’s very likely they don’t even realise how their behaviour has been effecting you.

The Non-Responder

This bridesmaid is a nightmare to get hold off, doesn’t respond to your texts, calls or emails and is near impossible to pin down for dress fittings.

How to handle a bad bridesmaid

As you excitedly message your maids with your latest wedding ideas, bookings and purchases, it’s nice to get a reply back where they are just as excited as you. If one of your maids just refuses to acknowledge your wedding speak then take a moment to think about when you last messaged or called just to ask how she is – if you can’t remember then perhaps ease off the wedding talk for your next few messages.

Alternatively if you have spoken to her lots but she refuses to join in your wedding talk then it may be worth talking to her to let her know how you feel – she may not even realise she ois being so flakey.

The Budget Conscious Bridesmaid

This maid constantly moans about the cost of the wedding, the travel and any other expenses.

Hen dos, hotels, shoes, jewellery, hair and make-up can all add up – if you have a bridesmaid that is particularly budget conscious then be mindful with what you ask your maids to pay for themselves. Some girls will be perfectly happy to pay for their own shoes or even hair and make-up but others may not be so willing. Think carefully about your bridesmaid’s financial state before making too many demands.

The Liability

She's the girl you used to spend your single nights out with and knows every embarassing story about you.

Bad Bridesmaid

If you think your bridesmaid may blurt out a few too many funny stories about your wild and single days, then save yourself the worry and have a chat with her about your concerns before the wedding. Keep it light hearted and explain about all your “unreasonable wedding worries” and she’ll know what funny anecdotes to leave at home!

The Over-Bearing Bridesmaid

This maid is wedding-mad but sometimes her enthusiasm can feel a little controlling.

In theory your wedding-loving best friend is the perfect bridesmaid choice but in reality too many opinions can be overwhelming. Give this over-bearing bridesmaid some specific tasks to take care of so she has a part of the wedding she can really own and it will keep her out from under your feet.

Don’t forget that no matter what their flaws, you valued these girls enough to ask them to support you on your special day and most issues can be easily fixed by talking. If you have some of the best bridesmaids then take a look at some of our favourite bridesmaid gift ideas.



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