leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

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• 19-Mar-2010 10:42

  leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  spud77 Joined on 24-Jul-2008 Posts 2,302

  Contact Couldn't really work out how to word the title so hope that makes sense! Some friends are arranging a get together back in the town where we grew up. A few of our friends still live there, but my closest friends don't and wuld be staying with their folks. My folks left the country 4 years ago when they retired, so for these things it's usually been a case of either one of us driving, or being able to crash on a friends parents floor if it's available. Obviously we now have Dylan, which makes it a lot more complicated. In good traffic it takes an hour to get there from Reading, with bad traffic it can be double that. We could get a babysitter and go, but it would mean leaving Dylan in Reading while we'll be at least an hour away. Am I being daft in not wanting to be that far away from him at the moment? We've left him with babysitters before but never been more than about 20 minutes/half an hour away at most. He's a good sleeper (mainly) and we'd most likely leave him with my PIL but I can't help worrying about what if something happens...  I'm being daft aren't I? Would you go? TIA Sx

• 19-Mar-2010 11:12

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  spud77 Joined on 24-Jul-2008 Posts 2,302	Contact No-one got any opinions at all?

• 19-Mar-2010 11:15

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  godmother Joined on 21-Mar-2006 At the bottom of a hill - United Kingdom Posts 16,128	Contact H and I went into London when N was 5 mths old.  We were about an hour away. Eliza Doolittle: Come on, Dover, move yer blooming ar$e! 06 09 My blog: http://dopeyanddizzy.wordpress.com/

• 19-Mar-2010 11:18

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  Lucky Charm Joined on 26-Apr-2006 Dubai, UAE Posts 1,499	Contact For me I would go, as I know my PIL would ensure he was safe and well looked after. Not daft, just a caring mum!

• 19-Mar-2010 11:28

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  Mazzy-moo Joined on 21-Jan-2008 United Kingdom Posts 7,156	Contact I'm going to one of my best friend's wedding at the end of May, when O will be 6 months. Its in a village barely 5 miles from where we live, but I'm already having kittens about the whole thing. So, I don't think you're being daft at all. Although I also have no advice on what to do as I haven't got a clue either!

• 19-Mar-2010 11:29

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  loobyg Joined on 10-Jan-2008 Welsh Wales Posts 11,028

  Contact I'm leaving sarah with my mum in a few weeks time but during the day. In theory I'll be a 20 min drive away but if she called me needing me to come home by the time I've left the do, got to the car and got through what could be quite bad traffic it could be a lot longer. At the end of the day, if something was really wrong I trust my mum enough for her to take action without needing my input so I'm OK with it. You obviously trust your PIL and so I wouldn't have a problem with it in your shoes, although I'd be thinking twice about being that far away if S was with a non-family member IYSWIM - the person they are with makes all the difference. Sarah May, 26th October 2009 Connie Rose, 16th July 2011   Hand painted nursery art at http://kidscanvases.weebly.com/

• 19-Mar-2010 11:35

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  Mrs Claus Joined on 18-Dec-2008 Santa's Grotto Posts 7,267

  Contact We left L with ILS when she was 5 months and we went to Venice on our honeymoon so was quite a way away.It is a tough decision especially 1st time round. I think I didn't find it too difficult because my boys are from my 1st marriage so I have always been used to them going away for weekends. I would think it will be fine for you too but you have to whatever you are happy with. http://my-culinaryadventures.blogspot.com/

• 19-Mar-2010 11:39

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  Spamboule Joined on 23-Sep-2007 United Kingdom Posts 5,924

  Contact Does D see your PIL regularly? What I mean is, if he is happy in their company and he knows them quite well, I'm sure he will be fine. And if he stays asleep the whole time, he wouldn't even notice! Personally I couldn't leave Isla, partly becuase she refuses the bottle or cup so only I can feed her and partly because she doesn't see her grandparents (or anyone else for that matter) often enough to be really familiar with them An hour isn't really that far in the grand scheme of things, don't forget your PIL will have dealt with babies in their time!

• 19-Mar-2010 11:41

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  JasmineJ Joined on 29-Jun-2009 Posts 571	Contact I would go. Your PIL will manage just fine - and it's only an hour...not the other side of the world. But then, I think I'm quite a neglectful mother as I left A for the first time during the day at about three weeks and over night at about eight weeks!!  We're going to a wedding in Liverpool when he is eight months, and we'll be leaving him for two nights with my parents.

• 19-Mar-2010 12:05

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  jelly baby Joined on 22-Feb-2005 United Kingdom Posts 17,952	Contact The answer is really whatever distance you are happy with. Zoe regularly stays with my mum for a couple of nights, since she was 4 months old, and that's 2 hours away.  When I'm back at work I will be 3000 miles away ...   Apologies for lack of capital letters - Zoe has stolen my shift key

• 19-Mar-2010 12:13

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  Mrs Sweetapple Joined on 10-Jan-2007 By the Sea Posts 1,961	Contact WEES - it's whatever you are comfortable with. R has stayed over at my mum & step dads regularly since he was 3 months old, but he sees them a lot anyway and has since birth.

• 19-Mar-2010 12:19

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  sofa leopard Joined on 11-Jul-2003 United Kingdom Posts 8,408

  Contact As EES, it's one of those things that is a personal decision and entirely up to you. No reflection on you or your parenting either way. (Although I'm prob not the best person to comment - I left Holly (17 months) overnight with just H for the first time ever this week and we've never left her overnight with anyone else. Having said that, there isn't really anyone who I think we could leave her with at the mo)

• 19-Mar-2010 12:21

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  spud77 Joined on 24-Jul-2008 Posts 2,302

  Contact Thanks everyone, I guess maybe I am being a leetle bit daft, but glad I'm not the only one! I do trust the PIL, MIL is a childminder <whispers> but a bit dappy <whispers>, but FIL is pretty no nonsense. D sees them fairly regularly but they're also not local so it's an hours drive for them to come to us as well. I know that D will probably sleep through us being out and instead wake us up around 3am wanting to chat , it's partly a worry that something might happen to stop us getting back to him i.e. car breakdown, I don't want to be away from him too long <soppy mare icon>. I suppose it's time to cut that umbilical cord and give it a go! Thanks, Sx ETA: SL - I can't even think about overnighters just yet..the thought of my boy waking up in the morning and us not being there...

• 19-Mar-2010 12:40

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  bookgirl Joined on 05-Jan-2006 United Kingdom Posts 5,336

  Contact It's up t you what distance you feel is ok. I've been 20-30 mins drive away at the furthest on one occasion and the longest I've been apart fromIzzy is 5 hours (evening so while she was asleep). I can't imagine doing more than that yet - she's 9mo. However I know someone who's recently been away for 10 days, a 12hr flight away, her LO is a day older than mine. Only you know how you will feel about it. If you're not ready, it's ok.

• 19-Mar-2010 15:04

  Re: leaving a 5 month old for the evening, what distance away is ok?

  Irgalite Joined on 08-Aug-2007 United Kingdom Posts 5,923

  Contact We left A with my parents for 4 nights when she was 4 months old.  She was in Paisley and we went to Birmingham, so 4-5 hours drive, though we were flying.  I was fine about leaving her as I trust my parents and they wuold never let anything happen to her.  I have a hen weekend booked in June when L will be 3 months old, both children will be staying with H obviously but my parents will have them while he is working.  Again it doesnt bother me as I know they will be absolutely fine with their Daddy and Grandparents.