Wedding dress wobbles!

I've tried loads of dresses on and the one I ended up with was not at all what I thought I'd go for, shape wise, I thought I wanted ethereal and flowing. What I've got is plain, ruched and very fitted with pick ups, I thought I hated pick ups. I also have a train, I didn't want one of those either! I'm now getting a veil. I always hated veils! My point is people who haven't seen you in it don't know how you felt, your dress is a very personal thing which you know is right when you put it on. You'll look amazing no matter what and anyway, shocking your guests by mixing it up a bit will definitely have great impact.

(I also have three dresses by the way because I didn't listen to my heart in the first place, listen to yours).

It's not about what others expect to see you in it's about what you want and what you're comfortable in :-)

It can be normal to obsess and second guess yourself, but you said yourself that deep down you knew the dress was the right one.

Stick with it x

I think everyone has dress wobbles at one point. There is a stupid amount of pressure on brides to look perfect and please everyone that we get confused and slightly panic. The night before I got my nails done I had a full meltdown as I couldn't decided between French tip or glam and sparkly, now it sounds stupid but at The time I was just overwhelmed and couldn't think straight

I think you already no you've chosen the right dress, you just need to trust yourself. When people comment about what they thought you would of chosen just smile and say yes I tried that on but my princess dress suited me better.

Everyone will think you look beautiful on the day and not one will be thinking you should of picked another style I promise.

Is it an option to try both dresses on again or is that not an option? Are you totally committed to that dress now?

If if you are committed then I would say go back and try it on again alone and I'm sure without everyone staring at you you will be reassured that it's the right dress.

I tried on my dress in a showroom, ordered it and then waited a month for it to be made and shipped from Australia. In that time I worried that I wasn't wowed when I first tried it on in the showroom but I think in hindsight it is just quite awkward when everyone is watching you and it's such a big moment, you feel like there is a lot of expectation. I found that once my actual dress arrived and I tried it on in the comfort of our own home away from people I felt totally reassured that it was the one. You just can relax more and you're over the initia excitement of trying it on for the first time.

Yup, I agree with this! Not being what people expect doesn't mean they won't like it anyway

Everyone's expecting me to wear a short 50's style dress and I've gone full ballgown, massive train and gigantic veil!

I still get wobbles when people try and guess what I'll wear but I'm confident I look great in my dress so I'm managing to ignore them!

It helped me to have a picture of me in the dress.I have one picture I love where I look great and I kept that (I deleted some less flattering ones). It perked me up any time I wobbled

Stick with your gut! You've said a few times through the post that you know the princess dress is the right one... it's totally the right one going by that.

Everyone said they expected to see me in a full lace gown for our wedding, there wasn't a hint of lace anywhere on mine - it was full crepe silk. I also bought the most 'out there' bolero / cape which was jewel encrusted and made from tiers of tulle.. because I had a winter wedding, a lot of people were saying 'Oh I bet you have a fur / feather stole', because that's just what they thought every winter bride would have, so why would anyone do anything different to what they perceive as the 'norm'? Funnily enough I asked a few of my friends what led them to think lace for me, and they said it was where I'm quite tall and slim so they saw me in a tighter fitting lace dress. The lace was just because that seems to be the 'in' thing at the minute. So I bet some of these comments are just people thinking 'tall / slim = form fitting column dress', in the same way people might think someone under 5'3 should be in a tea length dress, when in fact there are no rules on these things.

Other people don't have the insight that any of us have about ourselves - it sounds like the princess dress is the winner for you, so I'd say that's the decision made :-). Wear it with confidence, you'll look amazing x

I had exactly this! I expected to choose a more princessy dress (and I'm sure this is what people expect me to have) and ended up with a slim fitting lace number! I still have niggles in my mind, but every time I worry I just remind myself of how I felt in the dress I chose - and that it made me feel elegant, beautiful and comfortable (comfort is very important too!) the princess ones made me feel like I was dressing up a bit, a bit like a costume, so I really surprised myself!

a wedding dress is so unlike any other item of clothing you'll ever try on, so it's impossible to know what you're going to go for beforehand, and even more impossible for friends and family to pre-empt. On the day everyone will just think how beautiful you look, and no one will even question it. I'm quite looking forward to surprising people with my choice in a way!

Don't second guess yourself and go for it! I'm sure you'll look stunning! I think it's normal to worry a bit after you've bought the dress too purely as it's such a big decision, but go with your gut

I also imagine you wear a lot of pencil style clothes/fitted? Its hard to imagine somebody in something completely different to what they would wear normally, not that you wear a wedding gown everyday!

Everybody is entitled to an opinion - but look at all the factors.. even your special meaning. Thats your dress

Thank you to all of your lovely and reassuring words ladies, you have all definitely helped you made some really true points about the way I'm feeling and whats been going on my head since I've bought my dress.

I think what kicked off my wedding dress wobbles was that I showed my aunty a photo of me in the princess dress and me in the slim lace dress. She told me she loved the slim one best, and this was after I had bought the princess one, so it upset me a bit. (my aunty is like a mum to me and she wanted to pay for my dress, so I think it hit hard that she preferred me in the other dress). And then that weekend when I told family members I had bought my dress, that's when the comments started about how they think i'd look best in a slim number and think I've chosen a slender style.

After my melt down I realised that the pictures of my dress don't do it justice, for starters it needs altering to fit me better and also, my aunty wasn't there on the day and didn't see how I reacted to wearing the princess dress. I am now thinking more positively and am going to bring her to my first dress fitting so she can see the dress in person and see how happy I am wearing it then hopefully she will fall in love with it like we did.

My best friend and mum kept reassuring me that I had chosen the best dress too, and agreed that the slim one was beautiful but didn't suit me as well as the princess one.

Funnily enough, when I look back at photos of the slim dress, I don't even like it as much now. I hated the lace when I first tried it on! I think I just loved the way it fit my figure perfectly. On paper, it is kind of an expectation I suppose for slim brides to choose a dress that best shows off their figure. It's true, the lace dress did go perfectly well with my petite figure, but actually, its not all about showing off my figure. My husband to be knows what my figure is like, he doesn't need reminding and no-one else really matters. I know he will love my dress and it will probably shock him when he sees the one I've chosen which I'm really excited for.

I realised that I went with my heart rather than my head and I now don't regret it. I remember the feeling I got when I tried it on, I was beaming. So, I'm hoping that I can get past any more comments that may get made about assumptions of my dress choice. You can't please everyone anyway!!

Thanks again everyone x

Glad you are feeling better Blossom!! Stick to your guns. Lovely idea to bring your auntie to the fitting, wedding dresses look so much better in person than in a picture particularly when you're wearing a sample size.

also have you been watching love island?! On paper!!!

Thank you SomethingBlue, Yes I agree, once it fits me to size and everything it will probably look really different. I haven't been watching it but I've seen memes about that on Facebook lol! x

Sorry that I'm a bit late to this thread!

I'm glad that you managed to make a decision - it makes it especially hard when you try to imagine people's thoughts and responses to your dress. As others have said though, it is about how you feel in the dress, it's your day and your dress and I'm sure when it does get to your wedding day, all the guests will really be thinking is how beautiful you look and how happy they are for you.

It's best to stick with your gut instinct with big decisions like this! Now you have all of the other exciting wedding decisions to make - be sure to keep us updated! Also don't forget to store your dress properly in time for the big day (if your wedding dress store isn't able to keep it) if you need any tips try blog posts like this one, I found them quite useful!

Thank you LuxuriousRedDecor852 these are great points x