Budget vs Dream Wedding

I know this is my first post here but i've slowly been stalking around in the background on these forums reading loads and I'm truely at a cross roads.

At the moment I feel like i either choose to get married in 2 years and do it with only a budget of £2000, if that, or i save and do it how i've always dreamed but it wont be for literally 10 years.

For any of you that have had to choose between your dream wedding or reality, what did you pick?

I'm just getting saddened by the whole thing cos I'm only ever going to do this once, and i feel like if i dont do it how i've always dreamed then its something i'm gonna have missed out on forever. I will have never had a big day. My partners been married before, brought a house before and had a kid before, hes done all the milestones once and he did them all in a massive way, he had the 25K wedding and i feel like maybe thats why hes not as fussed about it as me. we were discussing budgets the other day and he said "if we cant afford to celebrate after, then we just wont. we'll go down the registry office and then go home" and i was gutted. I'd probably cry if that was my one and only 'big day'. if i went out for all of an hour with no photos to show for it and then came home in my wedding dress.

I dont mean to sound materialistic and its not like i want something huge, i just want a little rural family day, a little afternoon tea, nice country backdrop to pictures, a first dance surrounded by all my loved ones. but thats out of our budget. :(

Firstly, welcome!

You can have a dream wedding on a budget you know! Just takes a little imagination, asking friends and family to help and bargain hunting. I have pulled in favours everywhere and people have been more than happy to chip in!

StaceyH:

Firstly, welcome!

 

You can have a dream wedding on a budget you know! Just takes a little imagination, asking friends and family to help and bargain hunting. I have pulled in favours everywhere and people have been more than happy to chip in!

 

WSS! A little imagination goes a long way.......  Welcome to the forum BTW! x

awww unfortunatley we have recently had a reality check! we aren't getting married until 2014 due to saving! we are saving for a wedding and a house so we have it double argghh!!! we wrote a list of everyone we wanted there and realistically if we want the 3 course sit down followed by reception at a nice venue the whole wedding is looking at around 10 grand which is a ridiculous amount!! we are now looking at other options and cutting down on certain things and we are lucky enough to have donations from both sides but it's still a struggle to deal with what you want and what you can have...you can have a really nice wedding for £2000 as long as you keep your numbers very low!! thats what we have found difficult! the food and drink bumps it right up!

how do you know that in 10 years time when you have saved £10,000 lets say that you will want to spend your money on that and not something else? personally i would go for the cheaper wedding in 2 years time...i know that if we had ten grand in our hands we would rather put it on a house than an extravagent wedding but thats just us...most important thing is getting married to your OH!!

:) x

Hi hun,

We was in this situation for ages and in the end i just bit the bullet and decided to set the date and hope for the best. We have managed fine so far and ours is inbetween. We have just cut our numbers and gone fro somewhere a bit different than you convensional hotel etc which i did always picture myself having but i am quite excited about our venue now.

I found that once i set the date all my family and friends came out of the wood work with offering to pay for things and people they know who can help and we have saved a small fortune i.e my friends mum makes and sells cupcakes so has offered to do this for us for our wedding present. 

My OH's friend is a photographer and is doing our photo's for free.

He also has a friend who knows some one who has vintage wedding cars so is sorting that for us.

His mum has given us the money for our evening buffet and wedding cake and half of our honeymoon.

My mum is paying for my wedding dress, church and decs and rings too. 

My sister is doing my sweetie table and my nan is buying my wedding shoes.

All of the above i would never had any idea would have been offered had i not set the date so i would say go for it. Also alot of suppliers now let you pay in installments for it so you can afford it.

HTH x

wishfulwhispers:

I know this is my first post here but i've slowly been stalking around in the background on these forums reading loads and I'm truely at a cross roads.

 

 

 

At the moment I feel like i either choose to get married in 2 years and do it with only a budget of £2000, if that, or i save and do it how i've always dreamed but it wont be for literally 10 years.

 

 

 

For any of you that have had to choose between your dream wedding or reality, what did you pick?

 

 

 

I'm just getting saddened by the whole thing cos I'm only ever going to do this once, and i feel like if i dont do it how i've always dreamed then its something i'm gonna have missed out on forever. I will have never had a big day. My partners been married before, brought a house before and had a kid before, hes done all the milestones once and he did them all in a massive way, he had the 25K wedding and i feel like maybe thats why hes not as fussed about it as me. we were discussing budgets the other day and he said "if we cant afford to celebrate after, then we just wont. we'll go down the registry office and then go home" and i was gutted. I'd probably cry if that was my one and only 'big day'. if i went out for all of an hour with no photos to show for it and then came home in my wedding dress.

 

I dont mean to sound materialistic and its not like i want something huge, i just want a little rural family day, a little afternoon tea, nice country backdrop to pictures, a first dance surrounded by all my loved ones. but thats out of our budget. :(

 

I think you could probably do this on a small budget,  It depends if you want to get married now, or you can wait.  Im waiting but I just want to be Mrs K and married. 

I agree with what others have said.  I opted for somewhere in the middle.  We are spending a total of 3 years being engaged, due to buying a house, so wedding funds aren't great.

However, by me deciding what is most important, I am able to have the day I want by being a little creative. We are spending money on photographer as thats important to us.  But we are having the slightly cheaper meal options at a lovely simple venue.  My dress was a sample so under half the retail price, making own wedding cake, order of service booklets etc.  There are ways to have a cheaper wedding but still have the feeling and atmosphere you want.  Remember you get to marry the man you love, and while we all want everything to go with it, it really is window dressing.

Make a list of things you really want and then a list of things you will compromise on to have your wedding in a couple of years and become a wife.

Thanks for all your messages guys

half of me would love to do a private ceremony and the two of us just run off and do it, but I have a 4 year old step daughter whose been through any and every wedding magazine thats come in declaring she wants the biggest most beautiful white princess dress, a pick n mix stand which she will run and pass out the sweets from and the biggest cake possible. she speaks about us getting married more than i do. shes got all the colours picked and she doesnt understand why we're not just shopping for it and doing it lol, i wish i was as carefree as her at wedding planning

i think i just need to get really creative. i struggle to find somewhere to get married and have the reception seperate as it seems the reception is where the prices go through the roof. my partner and I arent religous though so i'm trying to find two venues not too far from each other that compliment eachother. its a shame cos where I live theres a stunning church and church hall two steps next door to it that are amazing, but i cant choose to believe for a day

It's definitely possible to have a beautiful wedding with a 2K budget, you just have to be a bit more creative and definitely realistic. Eg don't expect to be able to have a brand new dress (sample or pre-loved are great) or a 400 person guest list!

I know exactly how you feel! My partner are and I are planning our wedding on a very similar budget because we just can't justify spending more when we regularly struggle for money. Focus on the big ticket items - venue, food, photography, dress. If you can find ways to save on these then you're well away! Everything else can be handmade or donated.

Do you have a friend with a big garden where you can put up a marquee for the reception?

I am planning on saving money by making a whole dessert table - guests can enjoy things I've made AND fill themselves up as we *definitely* can't afford a sit down meal.

Dress - you can have your dream dress from a sample sale/ ebay/ preloved sites. None of these take away the magic!

I am just concentrating on making our wedding reflect us completely with as many items created by us and saving loads of money in the process.

Hope this helps and keep posting here as everyone is really lovely and helpful!!

Hi,

One way of doing it cheaper might be to do the legal bit at the registry office, then you can have a humanist ceremony anywhere you like!

When I was looking for venues there were lots of lovely places that you could hire for alot less if it was just for a day/afternoon and evening without a ceremony, or if you know someone with a lovely garden you could ask to borrow it?

I think what you have described is totally do able - I'm sure if you asked the people close to you they would help you out by catering and making a cake etc as a gift.

I totally agree with you - don't feel you have to do without your day, but don't be disheartened, its amazing what you can save on if you want to!

Hello! It will require creativity but will be very personal and fun to organise.  Have you thought about trying to make a feature of your wedding - stirr up some interest on some of the high profile wedding blogs / magazines. If you can get an agreement for an article to be published (the more creative your wedding, the more likely this is), then your suppliers may offer you discounts in return for mentions in the various media coverage you manage to get. Reclaimed weddings are attracting a lot of attention, where you re-use items to create your big day. Do a quick Google on this and you will find loads of ideas. How are you at arts and crafts?

Davialle:

Do you have a friend with a big garden where you can put up a marquee for the reception?

I think this can sometimes work out really expensive - as marquees are a lot of money to hire (thousands, usually)

I do think this is definitely do-able though! Whereabouts are you? Is there a lovely registry office near you - for instance, Colchester Town Hall is lovely - you could get some lovely pictures there and then go into town to a cafe with some outside space and get them to put on a buffet/meal for you. Lots of smaller venues won't charge a hire fee - there is a lovely coffee shop in our town with a patio and lots of seating that will give you exclusive hire from 4pm onwards for free and you buy a buffet and they can provide a cash bar (where they get their profits I would imagine). Would this work?

If you went for a SUmmer wedding, you could have a later ceremony and still have light for photos, and also have the added money saving bonus of only feeding people once - if you chose winter, you might want to be a bit careful as, say, a 4pm wedding would leave you with no time for pictures as it would be dark by the time the ceremony was done.

Or, you could go for a lovely meal somewhere with a private dining room for a small number of people - 20 people, say 30 per head for a set menu, I think you could get somewhere nice for that if you had a good look!

Otherwise, you could hire a village hall and do it all up yourself - if you look around I bet you can find a lovely rural setting with outside space etc and get the 'country' feeling you mentioned.

I really think that you can do it in 2 years - where are you so we can get searching for some of the big things for you and give you an idea of what you can get?

Also, as someone else said, a second hand dress is a GREAT way to save a bit of dough

Gurzle:

Davialle:

Do you have a friend with a big garden where you can put up a marquee for the reception?

 

I think this can sometimes work out really expensive - as marquees are a lot of money to hire (thousands, usually)

 

Also, as someone else said, a second hand dress is a GREAT way to save a bit of dough

 

Youy make good points - when I wrote marquee I think I really meant gazebo's - from the description the OP gave of her ideal day I think even if they are not matching and gazebos borrowed from friends and familiy it would still work - though that would mean having to have some inside space too, given theold Britishe weather!

You don't mention where you are, but near me is a great dress shop where she sells pristine quality samples m I think everything is under £500 and quite alot only a couple of hundred for the over a £1000 designer dresses.

If you don't mind letting people know where you are I'm sure they might have ideas of venues and other suppliers etc.

i definately think you can do it on a budget! as others have said you can make things and you would be surprised at the amount of people come out of the woodwork with contacts in the right places!! like me for example my aunts friend is a photographer so we're getting him for next to nothing! the venue we're getting a good discount on as h2b does their fir alarm systems! and when it comes to dresses there are so many sites that are selling beautiful dresses for like £200!!! and at the end of the day its you and h2b that are most important and the vows you will be saying to eachother! xxx