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Wording for gifts/money

Vickydrip
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  • Wording for gifts/money

    HI All

    I am getting married in July and am currently making our wedding invitations but I am having some trouble with some wording.

    Like most couples, me and the grom to be have our own house and everything we need for it, and would ask that if anyone wanted to buy us a gift, they would instead contribute towards our honeymoon.

    I would like to put some lines or a small verse in the invites to state this (but in a much nicer way) and am coming up empty ... has anyone got any ideas of a lovely way to put it, rather than "We don't want your gifts so give us money for honeymoon instead"

    We were also thinking of having a wishing well at the wedding with envelopes for people to put contributions in (that way they an write a message on the envelope if they wish)

    Thanks

    Vicky x x x

  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    How about a poem?

    We are sending out this invitation
    In hope you will join a celebration
    But if a gift is your intention
    May we take this opportunity to mention
    We have already got a kettle and toaster
    crockery, dinner mats, and matching coasters 
    so rather than something we have already got
    We would appreciate money for our honeymoon pot
    But most importantly we request
    That you come to our wedding as our guest

  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    Sorry, but as a guest, I would find that quite offensive. You've just asking for money, which, for some, is quite rude. What about honeymoon vouchers instead? I think some companies do these.

    If I recieved such a poeom in an invite, I would buy a gift.

  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    Hi

    To the first poster, I like that poem - thanks

    To the second poster - I understand your point, but we don't want people to buy us 'gifts' that we neither would want nor use.
    We are saying that if you were going to buy us something, please contribute to our honeymoon, if you don't want to buy us something or donate that is also fine.

     

    Many Thanks


    Vicky x

  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    Weve been to numerous weddings in the last few years, the majority saying that they dont want gifts, but would appreciate the money for honeymoon etc. I dont see how anyone can find this offensive! 

    A wedding list is a traditional request, but most people have lived together so the money that would be spent on a gift can be put towards a honeymoon. No difference! Plus, saves people having to wonder what to buy as a gift! 

    We put an additional slip of paper in with the invites saying:

    As we are so lucky to have a home together and already own many of the items that we need, we have decided not to request wedding gifts. We know, however, that some of you have been enquiring about this so we would like to say that if it is your intention to mark the occasion of our marriage with a gift, then we would be more than grateful to receive a small contribution towards our honeymoon.

    More than anything, we hope that you can make it on the day, so please dont feel obliged to give in any way.

  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    we are like you but the poems annoy me if asking for money or vouchers just ask, i have put a note in our invites saying that as we have been together for many yrs we do not have a gift list but would appreciate a small donation towards our honeymoon, this can be via vouchers from xxxx or cash but most of all would prefer for you to spend the day with us x

    not exactly as its written but you get the gist

    <a href="
  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    Jules'n'Mark:

    As we are so lucky to have a home together and already own many of the items that we need, we have decided not to request wedding gifts. We know, however, that some of you have been enquiring about this so we would like to say that if it is your intention to mark the occasion of our marriage with a gift, then we would be more than grateful to receive a small contribution towards our honeymoon.

    More than anything, we hope that you can make it on the day, so please dont feel obliged to give in any way.

    I like this. Nice , simple, straight to the point but not rude. 

    Can't believe i'm going to marry the most perfect man for me Big Smile 

  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    i dont see how its rude. I think its better for guests to give you something which you need

  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    I think it's a matter of approach.

    Traditionally, as a couple wouldn't have lived together before marriage, gifts were given to help them set up in their new home. Ok, so that's a bit outdated now in that couples are more likely to already live together and have most of what they need, but in that case the rationale for the gifts has gone and like Sange says, switching it to a request for money for a holiday could be seen as rude by some i.e. because the gift wasn't for your marriage as such, but for your future home as a couple. 

    I think if you know your family and friends would not have any difficulty with a reques for money, then go for it, but in that case you don't need to dress it up in a poem, just keep it simple and polite. 

     

    Daisypath Wedding tickers

    Find out about our house renovation escapades in my blog:  http://littlegreycloud.wordpress.com :)

     

     

    I Love Audrey!

     

    Mrs BV since 14 July 2012

  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    I have seen invites that say - We request your presence not presents for our special day but if you would like to a contribution towards our honeymoon would be much appreciated. Or words to that effect.

  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    • robinsr
    • Joined on 20 Sep 2011
    • Oxfordshire
    • Posts
      73

    I don't think it's rude to ask for contributions to a honeymoon- that is what we will be doing as we, like many others live together and pretty much have everything we need.

    In fact, the four weddings we went to over the summer all asked for contributions to a honeymoon which we were happy to contribute towards. One had a wishing well which I thought was a nice touch.

    Jules'n'Mark:

    As we are so lucky to have a home together and already own many of the items that we need, we have decided not to request wedding gifts. We know, however, that some of you have been enquiring about this so we would like to say that if it is your intention to mark the occasion of our marriage with a gift, then we would be more than grateful to receive a small contribution towards our honeymoon.

    More than anything, we hope that you can make it on the day, so please dont feel obliged to give in any way.

    Jules'n'Mark-  I think that say's it perfectly!  

     

    //

  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    Traditionally, as a couple wouldn't have lived together before marriage, gifts were given to help them set up in their new home. Ok, so that's a bit outdated now in that couples are more likely to already live together and have most of what they need, but in that case the rationale for the gifts has gone and like Sange says, switching it to a request for money for a holiday could be seen as rude by some i.e. because the gift wasn't for your marriage as such, but for your future home as a couple.

    I completely understand that, and I don't want to be seen to be saying "You must give us money when you come to our wedding otherwise you will be a cheapskate" I want people to come to our wedding and have a great day, and if, and only if, they want to give, then give us a donation.

  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    I completely understand that, and I don't want to be seen to be saying "You must give us money when you come to our wedding otherwise you will be a cheapskate" I want people to come to our wedding and have a great day, and if, and only if, they want to give, then give us a donation.

    I understand that you just want people to come along and have a good time, but who is going to turn up at a wedding without a gift? They will feel obliged to give you money. It's not about what you are saying, it's about what your guests will percieve you are saying.

    However you dress it up, you are asking for money.

  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    I agree with Sange.

    "If I worried what every *** was saying about me, I'd never leave the house."  Samantha Jones - Sex and the City.

     

  • Re: Wording for gifts/money

    We had an "extra information" part of invitations that was separate from the main invitation and on the back of the directions etc. that covered the following, including gift list: No-one had an issue with this at all, some people still gave us presents, some gave us cash...but most gave us vouchers. A lot thought it was a great idea to have vouchers as they then knew that it would be spent on what it should have been... Not cash that ended up down the pub or on new shoes...

    Not a fan of the poems, we wanted vouchers so we said so!

    Is confetti allowed?
    Confetti is allowed at the church but it must be biodegradable.
     
    What time should I arrive?
    The ceremony is due to start at 12.30pm, we ask that you arrive in time to be seated by 12.15pm. There will be photos in the Abbey gardens immediately after the ceremony (weather permitting!) before moving on to the reception.
     
    Should I eat beforehand?
    We will not be sitting down to the wedding breakfast until late afternoon so if you are anything like Mr C  you may want a hearty breakfast!
     
    Can we bring children?
    Due to limited numbers at the reception venue, we are only able to invite the children of family members and those with newborn babies under 6 months.  
     
    Is there a dress code?
    We don’t have a dress code as such; just wear your glad rags and make sure you have your dancing shoes on!
     
    Do you have a gift list?
    We have already set up a beautiful home together and so we have gift vouchers available from our travel agent which will go towards our honeymoon of a lifetime!  Gift vouchers are available by calling 01306 744 444 and quoting our reference number XXXXXXX.

    I am an Otter. I keep my favourite rock in my pocket.

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