Any DTC'ers around?

If so, just wondering how you are all doing?  I haven't anything at all worth posting.  Apart from I am on CD14 with nothing else to report.  We are still waiting for someone to contact us regarding our enquiry into adoption. 

Hope that everyone else is doing ok.

Hi mrslf I think the dtcers are mostly on deadwood now. Hope some one calls about the adoption soon. X

Ola!

First apt for second ICSI not until end of March, which I was fed up about, but it'd mean I'm cycling over Summer, and given that the success rates jump up over Summer, that's not all bad. My mum has just called me to say that she has to go back to Spain for a few weeks in April so "when are you planning treatment?" (She'd be having T on the days I'm in clinic.) I know she means well, but I think she thinks you just book and go. It was a bit of a weird body-blow to discuss it with her - I know I talk about it here, but in real-life it's a bit different I suppose, and I felt strangely winded, and somehow intruded upon. I know that's utterly selfish and unreasonable. I just get so angry that we have to go through this. And last night, MrHB, who really wants to have the mortgage paid off in 10 years, announced that "we're only having this one cycle so it had better work." No pressure then! He apologised for his massive insensitivity, but I know deep down he doesn't really get it. I want us to have a contingency for at least another two ARGC cycles, as I almost can't believe we'd be that lucky again second time around, but it's a vast amount of money, and no guarantee of anything. And it's less likely to work because I'm so much older. ANd then I feel terribly guilty because we have T, and I should be grateful and satisifed with him - I am - he's the best thing that has ever ever happened to me, but I really would like a sibling for him. I dont want the pressure of him being an only child for him - that way when he's older, he doesn't always have to have me over for Christmas!

So, all oversensitivity, and misplaced anger at the unfairness of it all, when others can get pregnant at the drop of a hat, and sometimes not even want it, and we have to sling £10k min each go, just to buy a ticket.

Sorry, I know that's all negative and ranty but it's where I am today.

Mrslf - are you set upon adopting now? My very good friend did, and their little boy was 6 months old when they got him, and he's a smasher! Really lovely and funny - he's a whirlwind of 3 now, and very busy and chatty. Hope you're well x x x

Sharrington:

Hi mrslf I think the dtcers are mostly on deadwood now. Hope some one calls about the adoption soon. X

 

Not this one!

Hollybags - Lovely to see you.  Fingers crossed for your second ICSI cycle in March, fingers crossed for a successful cycle.  I also completely understand how you feel about the fact that you are having to go through this.  I am sure that MrHB didn't mean to be so insensitive, although eh probably doesn't get it as much as we do. 

There is no need to apologise at all for being negative and ranty, that's what this site is here for and this is what this post is here for.

In answer to your question, we are set upon adoption, but not doing anything to prevent a natural pregnancy.  Me and H are struggling at the moment, if I am honest.  He tends to do his own thing and won't speak to me.  We are both undergoing counselling at the moment and have our second appointment on the 3 March.  The first session went ok and he came out of the session full of hope and saying that he was going to do what the counsellor suggested, then when it comes to it nothing happens.  I am trying to keep going as normal, but more often than not, I feel like bursting into tears, which is not a good idea when you are sat at your desk at work.  I really hate the fact that we are going through this, and I hate the fact that some people can be so insensitive and tactless and not think about our feelings before saying things to us.

Some of our so called family told us the other week that we weren't meant to be parents because if we were, I wouldn't have had 3 miscarriages and an ectopic pregnancy and they also suggested that H might be better of finding someone who can give him children, which hurt beyond belief and I haven't spoken to them since for that and I doubt I can bring myself to speak to them again for a long, long time.

Bloody hell Mrslf, your family member sounds like a total arse! You don't need people like that in your life. What and idiot! And total rubbish, of course. Is the logic there then, that people who are able to produce children easily are better parents??? If only it was that simple!

Very sorry to hear things are tense between you and Mrlf, but goodness me, given what youv'e both been through, it's hardly surprising! I think it's a testimony to all DTCers if you can stay married through something as hard as that!

I hope you get somewhere with adoption very soon. IN the meantime, miracles do happen! Have you read about NaPro technology? It's apparently so successful that uber-Catholic Poland are considering outlawing IVF and offering this instead as it's totally non invasive and has similar success rates, and os v good for those with rpt mc issues.

Glad there's still a few DTCers over here. One day, hopefully, there won't need to be. x x xx

mrslf:

Hollybags - Lovely to see you.  Fingers crossed for your second ICSI cycle in March, fingers crossed for a successful cycle.  I also completely understand how you feel about the fact that you are having to go through this.  I am sure that MrHB didn't mean to be so insensitive, although eh probably doesn't get it as much as we do. 

 

There is no need to apologise at all for being negative and ranty, that's what this site is here for and this is what this post is here for.

 

In answer to your question, we are set upon adoption, but not doing anything to prevent a natural pregnancy.  Me and H are struggling at the moment, if I am honest.  He tends to do his own thing and won't speak to me.  We are both undergoing counselling at the moment and have our second appointment on the 3 March.  The first session went ok and he came out of the session full of hope and saying that he was going to do what the counsellor suggested, then when it comes to it nothing happens.  I am trying to keep going as normal, but more often than not, I feel like bursting into tears, which is not a good idea when you are sat at your desk at work.  I really hate the fact that we are going through this, and I hate the fact that some people can be so insensitive and tactless and not think about our feelings before saying things to us.

 

Some of our so called family told us the other week that we weren't meant to be parents because if we were, I wouldn't have had 3 miscarriages and an ectopic pregnancy and they also suggested that H might be better of finding someone who can give him children, which hurt beyond belief and I haven't spoken to them since for that and I doubt I can bring myself to speak to them again for a long, long time.

 

 

 

hi Mrs Elf

Im not sure if you'll remember me from DTC threads of old but I just wanted to reply.

Thats truly awful what your family have said about your history.  I often felt like I was "not meant to have children" & people I know did say simiilar things to me which was just so upsetting.

I really hope you hear more about the adoption process soon as well, I just wanted to say that despite what some of your family have said, there is always hope. I am testament to that. Ive had 3 miscarriages myself over the last 4 years.

Lots of love to you xxx

Holly Bags mentioned napro...that's what we used and we now have a three month old daughter after four m/cs.  You can find out more about it in the UK here:

www.lifecharity.org.uk

Oh, and your family (I use the word loosely) have no clue what they are talking about. 

Or here:

http://www.naprotechnology.co.uk/

Thanks HB..I knew there was another one but baby brain has made me dippier than usual!

Mrslf, just wanted to give you a

Hello lovely

I am still around floating between the 2 I have jack all to say! just wanted to send you a massive and also for HB

We have just found out that our PCT may be withdrawing their funding until after the general election so we may need to pay affter all and if that is the case then we will save for a little while longer and throw the money at the ARGC. My H is so practical and is also determined we will be only be spending money on 1-2 cycles. hence why I was counting on the NHS cycle as a test cycle almost.

x