Nightime routine gone wrong

We've been so lucky with C sleeping well from very early on, but it seems to have gone a bit wrong recently - I know others have it much worse, but we just want to get back to how it used to be.

We get him ready for bed, then he has his milk and story (unless he decided he doesn't want one, which is quite often) then I'll put him down and leave the room.   He doesn't always go to sleep straight away, but was quite happy to just play in his cot for a bit until he does.  Ocassionally if he did get a bit upset, we'd speak to him over the monitor which calmed him down.

A few weeks ago this suddenly changed, and he'd cry once we left, so we'd have to sit with him until he went sleep, and then started to say "stay" which obviously meant he didn't want us to leave.  Only problem is, if we're in the room with him he'll mess around rather than trying to go to sleep.  We've tried putting him bed a bit later, but doesn't make any difference, and it's only when he's completely tired that he will go sleep within a short time.  Talking over the monitor just doesn't work anymore, and if we leave his room he'll just cry and cry and I just can't leave him like that.

Any suggestions on how we can get back to our old lovely bedtime routine where we can leave him to settle on his own?

x

Does your monitor play lullabies?  Our one does and if O starts to get grumpy, I often put this on and turn the nightlight on the monitor and she goes quiet straight away and (usually!) then falls asleep and I can turn the lullaby off.

I've also sometimes resorted to giving her a few cuddly toys in bed with her, as she likes to "chat" to them before she falls over!  It's like a zoo in her cot most nights

Thanks FF.  Yes the monitor does play lullabies, and that's something else we try with the nightlight, but that doesn't work recenlty either.  His bed is also full of toys at night too! x

Don't really have any advice, but we are having the same problem with our little boy who is about 3 months older than C.  It doesn't happen every night, but there is no patten that I can see for the nights it does happen. Sorry can't offer words of wisdom, I'm hoping it's a stage, but that doesn't help either of us very much!  Fingers crossed someone replies with the answer.  Good luck, I know how hard it is losing your evening to trips up and down the stairs! x

Thanks for posting MrsBubble, I'm glad C isn't the only one and hope they are both just going through a short phase!

As I was feeding him tonight, I said we'd both be downstairs, but he still kept telling me to stay, but I kept reassuring him we weren't far away.  I agreed to stay for 2 minutes, then when I left I put his music and nightlight on and he whined for a bit, but didn't really cry.  I spoke to him over the monitor, he occassionally did a bit more moaning, and neither of us actually went back up to him and he went sleep without too much fuss   Hope we can have similar again tomorrow night with no moaning at all!

We went through a phase of this with E after she moved into her big girl's room, and before C was born (so must have been around when she turned 2).  One of us would have to sit in her room with her until she fell asleep.  One day, she just didn't seem to need it any more.  I don't know why it changed, so have no real words of wisdom, but hopefully this will reassure that it is a phase that will pass (FWIW she wasn't doing it when C was born, so it must have lasted less than a month).

Tonight sounds promising.

Hope this doesn't come across as mean!

My little boy is also a fab sleeper, and at about 20 months he started 'playing up' a bit like this too!

He always self settled, from being in his own room at about 9 months. 

Then suddenly at about 20 months he started crying when I went to leave him after his story etc and crying for me to come back in.  I just said in a singsong voice ' ooh no darling, it's night night time' - or similar! and gave him a kiss and left the room. 

I then kept going back in every few minutes and doing the same until he got the point that I was not going to play with him or sit with him until he went to sleep.  I coul;d tell it was just a tired cry rather than a bad cry if that makes sense.

Sounds mean  but it really wasn't! I think it is really important that kids know they are not coming out of their room once they are in it!! ( unless of course they are ill which is different!)

I think as they get older they learn how far they can get by playing up and if  they will have you in their room they will.

hth,

Debs xxx

Thanks for sharing smudge, does sound similar and hopefully his whole recent clingy stage is passing (he didn't cry when I left him at nursery for the first time in ages!!)

DebsC - doesn't sound mean, I think you get to know what your LOs cries are like and whether it's more for effect or tiredness than actually something wrong.  I must be meaner than you because when C was doing his cry like that last night I didn't go back in, just spoke to him over the monitor to try and reassure him.  I think he has been teething the last couple of weeks also, so that might make him a little more moany than usual, but this not wanting us to leave him has been going on longer than that.  We've never taken him out his room unless we've really needed to (sickness, nappy change etc.) either.

Hopefully last night is the start of things turning round back to how they used to be - fingers crossed!

x x x