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GemmaLouise1986
Beginner

Wedding Party Gifts

GemmaLouise1986, 20 of March of 2011 at 13:55 Posted on Planning 0 9

Hi. Has anyone decided not to buy gifts for their wedding party?

I know it's the norm to buy gifts for BMs, Best Man etc but what if they've done NOTHING to help.

I've bought a gift for OH's BM as he has helped out and supported us. My BMs have done NOTHING and I'm loathe to buy them anything as I bought their outfit and accessories and tbh they've caused me stress if anything! Anyone else opted to not buy presents?

9 replies

Latest activity by Lynseys Designs, 20 of March of 2011 at 17:02
  • tinks269
    Beginner February 2011
    tinks269 ·
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    I didnt get my BM's anything other than their outfits and their hair and makeup, not because they havent done anything but because our budget was tight. We got the ushers small little tokens and OH is taking his BM to see Liverpool play some time as his present. I dont think anyone will expect a present and if you dont want to get them then dont get them one.

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  • GemmaLouise1986
    Beginner
    GemmaLouise1986 ·
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    Did you hand the Usher's gifts out with the speeches?

    I just didn't want to hand out BM gift and no others and people get upset....

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  • ebony_rose
    Genius
    ebony_rose ·
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    If they haven't done anything to help, then I won't be buying them anything.

    If only 1 or 2 have helped, then i'd give them their gift the day before or after the wedding.

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  • tinks269
    Beginner February 2011
    tinks269 ·
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    TBH I hate sitting at a wedding watchign present after present being handed out and hearing everyone say thank you. So no none of our presents were given out during the speeches.

    OH dad got his in time for teh stag as it was a new rod and they were going fishing. Everyone else got theirs the morning after the wedding. We went round to their room and said thanks and then gave them their present.

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  • GemmaLouise1986
    Beginner
    GemmaLouise1986 ·
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    Thanks ladies, that helps.

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  • ajdown
    VIP September 2011
    ajdown ·
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    We've bought our bridesmaids their jewelery for the day. Then they get to wear it on the day and they've had a gift too.

    All the men in our party have a matching tie they'll get on the day so we all match, and we haven't yet worked out what to get otherwise for the men.

    The mothers have some jewelery too.

    We haven't figured out for the dads yet.

    Not that anyone in particular (apart from one bridesmaid who's doing our silk flower arrangements) has done much to help yet either...

    I'm not sure where "buying gifts for everyone" has come from either - I think it's another of these 'americanisms' like chair covers that so many people fall into the trap of thinking they're essential when they aren't.

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  • Browny
    Beginner June 2011
    Browny ·
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    We've bought everyone a little something. We're giving them out the morning of the wedding. I think it'll be a nice moment between me and my girlies before the wedding and the same for OH had his ushers/BM. That way no-one gets bored during the lenghty speeches thanking everyone! Not decided on the parents yet and when they will get theirs - maybe the morning after?

    Plus if you give them out before/after and not during speeches no-one will be thinking 'where's my pressie?' if you didnt get everyone one!

    xxx

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  • A
    Beginner April 2011
    arnold2b ·
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    I know, my fiance wants to give the ushers something, but to me the present is being asked to be an usher, they get a nice smart suit and dont have to do much other than hand order of service out, i'd rather just buy them a beer! And we are having to get grooms mum something just for the sake of it really, because otherwise she'd be the only one on the top table without a present. Tho I suppose she does look after step son alot which is a great help.

    All this giving gifts is a bit OTT, i dont think people help at a wedding because they expect a gift, its usually because they'd like to help and be part of it. I wouldnt expect anything.

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  • Random Name
    Random Name ·
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    I'm the same. We will probably book a table at a resturant for after our wedding rehearsal and give the gifts then. That way if people want to wear the jewellery or cufflinks on the day they can. I didnt want to do it at the wedding as I dont like sitting though it either

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  • Lynseys Designs
    Beginner
    Lynseys Designs ·
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    Hi,

    I got my BM a bag to match her dress and had made her jewellery for the day so I gave her that the night before and my H gave the best man and usher their presents which were hip flasks and think he bought them a bottle of vodka or something. I refused to do presents during speeches, I find it a bit weird tbh. My parents got a wedding album afterwards but I also didn't want to do presents because my parents paid a lot towards the wedding and my MIL did nothing in terms of even helping or asking about the plans so wasn't giving her anything. x

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