Best man cancelled.

What an idiot, hope your OH is OK. Like others have said, at least he wont be there on the day. I best your brother is honoured to be BM if he's shown an interest in your day. Better now, than a few days before the big day. Good riddance

Thank you all so much for your messages.  You are all so sweet, it's lovely to have cyber-shoulders to cry on.  It feels as though a weight has been lifted off us both, we were so weighed down with worry over the ex-bestman and now we are just sighing with relief. 

My brother is definitely, without a shadow of a doubt, THE man for the job.  We have been sitting all day cursing the fact we didn't ask him first.  He's 18 and so you would expect him to be uninterested in something like a wedding and yet when I went to get my dress he was constantly on the phone asking about it.  He's so interested in all of the decisions we make and he just geniunely cares.  The old saying goes "weddings bring out the best and worst in people" and that saying couldn't be truer, friends come and go but family is for life.

Come on wedding, I'm ready to become a Mrs now!

Well I really do believe that everything happens for a reason sometimes, and in this case your Brother it seems was meant to the best man, although it was upsetting it sounds as if its all going to work out much better anyway

My h2b is having real problems having a best man, none of his close friends want to do it and have all hinted so he doesn't ask them!! can you believe that, they have all gone wobbly on him and basically dont want any responsibility so he has said stuff them and is not having one. My little flower girl who is 10 is going to have the rings in her basket instead to hand over at the ceremony.

People eh!!!

Oh Shnarfy!  I remember your first thread about this guy a few months ago - if I recall correctly you had your doubts about his committed-ness back then - and it looks like you were right - though it must be an awful thing to be right about  :(  what an ass he is.  Although I don't think anyone expects other people to re-arrange their lives around their wedding, you would expect people to have the common sense to see being asked to be Best Man is an honour and you shouldn't agree to do it if you aren't going to make the effort.

I don't think there's anything you could have done to change this guy's attitude and I think you've been really patient and calm with him to be honest because I can see you really wanted for your OH to have his friend there. 

But it's done now and, like others, I do think it's for the best.  Now you won't have to worry about him not being able to get there at the last minute or making a half-assed speech.  You've got someone lovely who cares about both of you and the wedding and being best man - that's much better!

Shnarfy1:

Come on wedding, I'm ready to become a Mrs now!

Huzzah!  That's what I like to hear  :D

What an idiot, some friend he is! Glad your brother is being bm now, he sounds like the better man for the job! x

Its absolutly awful that he could treat you and H2B in the way he has.  But it does actually sound as though he has done you both a favor.  Now instead of having a useless piece of rubbish acting as best man you now have the real deal in your brother.

Its going to be even more wonderful. xx