Just had a meltdown !!!

I just burst into tears !!!!

Had enough of being pregnant, looking after a ill toddler, i am not coping very well with this pregnancy and spd, I am constantly tired, I watched the one born every minute program yesterday and although I was fine till now, the reality of labour really hit me yesterday and I am really scared !!! I cant rememebr the pain from the first one but must have been bad as I begged for epidural and I am worried I wont cope well this time around !!

We had lost of stress financially for the last 6 months, lucky H got a new job but it feels like it is all getting to me now !!!

I am worried I wont cope with 2 children and will feel lonely if i cant manage to get out, William is still not walking and I dont know how I will manage with carrying to children

I feel so worried about everything

I am really happy to be pregnant, dont take me wrong but it all just seem a big mountain at the moment , I miss my family, my mum is coming in April but I could have done with her here now .....

anyway it just could go on..

sorry no point about this post but nice to let it out

Moz

37 weeks

Moz have a

Can you call your mum and ask her to come a wee bit earlier?  She might be only too happy to come and help you out, sounds like you've had a lot on your plate and everything's just hitting you now.

And I think it's perfectly normal to be happy to be pregnant and to also feel the way you do, mixed emotions and fear of the unknown etc

Feel free to vent on here x

Oh you poor thing, you do have a lot on your plate

FWIW, pregnancy and toddler is much much harder than newborn and toddler. You'll find your way once baby is here, a sling is an absolute godsend, do you have one? I'd be happy to meet you at a local park (they're re-doing the one by the station so it should be nice soon) or somewhere when you're up and about, even just for half an hour if it helps at all.

As for the labour, I think generally second labours are easier, but you can always have another epidural

You'll be fine, really

cwilson: my mum lives in France and works in a school so can only take school holidays, I am lucky that it falls at the same time when the baby is due, I am sure she would loveto come earlier but it is just not possible

Japnart: Havent got a sling, have a babybjorn but it hurts my back, W was quite heavy and I always had back problems, but would love to try one really, thank you for offering to meet, the park sounds like a lovely idea, just at the moment everything is a struggle, even to get to shops the idea of dressing william and putting my shoes ( which takes ages as i cant bent anymopre) then getting to the car , car seat, out of car, buggy .... as you know it is hard work, I feel i need a break when I just got into the car, never mind shopping !!! but once baby is here could be a lovely idea to meet

Oh Moz, what a lot to deal with! Being pregnant is difficult first time round never mind when you have a toddler too!

Do you have any friends nearby you could invite round just for a bit of company?

I feel exactly the same... A has whined all day as she has a cold and is being frustrated by everything it seems.

Just on the labour aspect, I haven't seen that programme, but someone did mention that it would tend to be the more eventful labours they show, otherwise it would be a bit boring. Do you worry less if you are doing practical things? I have found a nice section in a book of breathing and relaxation for labour that I'm going to start going through as then I feel I'll be most prepared.

Have a nice evening and hopefully a good night's sleep and I hope things feel a bit better in the morning.

moz, just to say I had spd and a 16 month gap between my boys...and my 2nd labour was a piece of cake compared to my first. (i'm even looking forward to my 3rd in a weird way) And you'll be suprised how well you'll cope. But it is really hard doing the pregnant thing...so give yourself some credit!

oh and btw my 1st baby came at 42 weeks....my 2nd came at 37 weeks...so you may not have that long to wait.

MM: I do have friends nearby but because william hasnt been well since saturday we have been stuck in, and it makes it so hard as he is fed up of being in abd wants me to play with him all the time or give him attention which I cant at the moment and because of his cough he is not napping well so no nap for me, I know i will feel better soon but it is just getting to me right now

TG: I am ok when i go out to toddlers group although it is physically draining , but william has been ill so we have been stuck and he wants my attention all the time and I just cant do anything, I am lucky that when he is well he plays well on his own , the tiredness,  lack of sleep is getting to me anbd the fast everythging physically feels like doing the marathon,

I dont seem to rememebr what it feels like to not be pregnant and have energy

Being pregnant with a toddler is hard work and doubly hard if you they or you are unwell. 

I have days where I'm fine emotionally and then the thought of labour hits me and I feel so anxious.  I didn't even have too bad a labour with Isobel so it's not as if I have something truly terrible to compare it to.  The not knowing what it will be like this time seems some how worse than last time.  You will be able to have an epidural again this time if you want one and some how we will both cope with having 2. 

Oh moz you have a lot on xx

I have no experience of 2 but looks like you have good advise, i have a moby you can borrow if you cant afford to get a sling ?

pinkluv: Thanks, that is reassuring

Angeldust: yes i know i can have epidural, just scared of the unknown of the known ( if that makes sense)

angelvic: thanks for the offer, i will see if i can get to try one of my friends, but thank you so much for offering

That makes perfect sense to me.  Its having some knowledge from last time and not kinowing how it's going to go this time.  With Izzy I had a 7.5 hour labout from sweep to her being born and it was all during the day.  The uncertaintity of knowing how it will start, how long it will go on for, how I will cope etc that's scaring me.