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Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

fancyfree
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  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    Hello everyone,

    First of all I want to say thank you to you all for your obviously heartfelt best wishes. I also want to say thank you in particular for the stories a lot of you have shared and a lot of the advice given. I have taken it on board and yesterday put out an SOS for groceries and as I came home just now for an hour or two I found my fridge full of fruit and vegetables (we've been living in takeaways). 

    So, an update.  This morning we went for the hurriedly-arranged surgery. The surgeon did the pre-op assessment and he said that the affected testicle was nothing but cancer any more. They moved the operating list around so he would have surgery in the morning early as he was nil by mouth since last night (while some patients had had breakfast!) and he was unlikely to need a bed overnight, thus earlier operating would keep a bed free. 

    I pottered around the hospital for hours and hours and hours, from about 10am. At 1pm H2B sent me a text that said "Go go go" which meant he was on his way to theatre. As you may or may not know, H2B is a doctor and so it's been a bit odd spotting friends and having to explain why we're there in a patient capacity, but today I met one of our friends and she distracted me for a whole hour between 1 and 2 (which is much longer than she ever takes for lunch!). She said she'd arranged her postponed smear test and had told all her male friends to check themselves. After she went back to work at 2pm I phoned up to the ward, but H2B was still in theatre. At 3pm I phoned the ward again and they said he was still in recovery, but was awake (that news was SUCH a relief) and I could come up and wait for him.

    So at just past 3pm, he was wheeled in and was quite alert and very very very well. I stayed with him till 4pm while he had various observations and things and left him once he was given morphine and went all woozy and sleepy and happy. His scar is sore and itchy (they had to shave him!!) but he's so relieved he has had the cancer removed.

    I'm at home changing the bed and making some dinner for when he returns. He has to wait to see the surgeon again for a debrief, which could be a few more hours.

    We've just this second had news that the radiologist has filed his report about H2B's CT scan and it is "clean as a whistle". And while we're not breathing a big sigh of relief just yet, we're glad to not be holding our breath.  

    From here, we have to wait for the outcome of the biopsy and H2B has to keep going for weekly bloods to check the cancer markers. This will determine what the next step is, whether that's chemotherapy or continued observation.

    What I mainly want to say now is ....

    TALK TO YOUR HUSBAND, FIANCE, BROTHER, UNCLE, DAD, NEPHEW, SON (etc!) AND REMIND THEM TO CHECK THEMSELVES. It mainly happens to young men (16-40) and you just don't know that you're ill. My H2B's lump was painful which is why he noticed, but they USUALLY ARE NOT painful. Check, and make sure they check regularly so that they know what is normal and what is changing. 


     

  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    hey ff, glad the inital tests have allowed tyou to stop holding your breath quite so much now and that he has rallied round after surgery. i hope you get good news from the consultant. im always on at OH to keep checking and am pleased to say that he does check constantly, infact he want to gp not so long ago with a lump which thankfully turned out to be nothing. you are one strong lady, if i had half the amount of strength and courage the both of you have i'd be on to a good thing. lots of hugs, cp and OH xx

     save the date 
  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    what a relief he has had the op and now waiting to come home. Look after yourself, and your patient too. 

    Fingers crossed for your next consultation with the Dr. 

    Big hugs Hug

    Daisypath Wedding tickers

  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    Hey fancyfree, just wanted to send lots of well wishes and good luck hugs your way. I've known a few people who have battled with cancer (friends and family) and so I know how much of an awful time it is for all involved. I also lost a friend to cancer last year, and remember how awful all the waiting to get tests and surgery done, and then waiting for results etc. Really glad things are moving quickly and that your H2B has had his op now. Hope he comes home soon. Take care of yourself too xxx

  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    ff, i'm so sorry to read your news.  but i'm so glad to hear that your h2b's CT scan is clear, hopefully this will mean a swift and trouble free recovery.  i hope they've caught it early enough for surgery to be the only treatment necessary.

    sending you big hugs lady x

    ma petite mademoiselle, Coco Love 31.10.11

  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    Oh fancyfree, I am so so sorry you are both going through this. Lots of vibes to your H for a speedy recovery x

    Lou Lou Belle Designs - handcrafted jewellery and hair accessories
      www.louloubelle.co.uk   lisa@louloubelle.co.uk   Facebook

  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    Oh Fancy free glad the surgery went well, and thats good news his scan was clear! I bet you can't wait to have him home. Make sure he rests, as I know men hate to be bed ridden.

    LxXx

    The hitcher formally known as Bailey_Wailey Smile

    Daisypath Anniversary tickers

     

  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    So glad that the surgery went well and that you found that these posts helped... x

    I will certainly be reminding every bloke I know to check...

    Love & Hugs xxx



    Married since 19.O3.2O11

    Dress for Sale: http://www.preloved.co.uk/adverts/show/104086706/jonathan-james-couture-wedding-dress-1012.html

  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    Hey FF

    Just read all of this - it's an awful & stressful thing, but things look a bit brighter for you.  My grandad had testicular cancer when my mum was 4 years old & after surgery he then went on to live a normal life for many, many years!  So finger's crossed all will be ok for you & H2B.

    Keep us posted.

    K.

    Katie Vale Designs

    Bespoke Headwear & Accessories, hand-made for you.

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    info@katievaledesigns.com

     

     

     

     

  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    I am keeping my fingers firmly, firmly crossed for you both.

    Best wishes. x

  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    • sdwrds
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 17-Sep-2008
    • Warrington/ Wigan
    • Posts 119

    I'm so glad that the surgery went well and that the initial tests are clear. Hope you both can relax a little now.

    Sending you both the best wishes and as RaeF said "fingers firmly crossed"

  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    Hello Brides and Brides to Be!

    I expect there's a whole new crew here now, but I just wanted to update you all to let you know that my husband (yay!) has just had his ONE YEAR ALL CLEAR.

    We are extremely happy, and I wanted to say again how wonderful the hitched girlies were and I won't forget your kindness.

    I'd also like to take the opportunity to say hello to all the new brides-to-be and ask them to get their fiancés to check their balls every month. Testicular cancer mainly happens to young men (16-40) and you just don't know that you're ill. My H2B's lump was painful which is why he noticed, but they USUALLY ARE NOT painful. Check, and make sure they check regularly so that they know what is normal and what is changing. 

    If you want to have a look at my wedding report, it's still here. Most emotional day of our lives, and long may our marriage continue!

    Best of luck with your planning and forthcoming weddings.

    Smile


     

  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    congratulations to you both on the 1 year all clear

  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    WOW I wasnt on here when you went through all this, but my heart totally went out to you as I read through the post.  I just wanted to say how pleased I am for the both of you that you have had the one year all clear.  ALthough I am guessing you will never stop thinking what if or I wonder it must be a massive relief to know.  xx

    And Mr and Mrs T lived happily ever after (well apart from when they were arguing or not talking to each other)

    Joint 3rd - MIA - I am touched I never knew you cared so much !

  • Re: Why our wedding is not the most important thing in our lives anymore

    Omg how terrible! Cant imagine what you are both going through! Good luck with his treatment and stay positive!

    Ticker id: IRv6

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