What would you change about BT and its posts?

I haven't been on DW, and have no intention of doing so. 

I started on Hitched during my WP days and left because I found it very kleeky, and none of the forums really applied to me.  I came back when I got my BFP, and everyone on BT was lovely and welcoming.  I enjoyed the tri threads, although I sometimes felt a little isolated as I could never Hitch from work so only posted on weekends.

Since E's arrival, I wouldn't have coped without the lovely people on here.  I am well aware that I am a taker at the moment, and feel incredibly bad for it - to the point of posting anon as I worry people will see me posting & groan.  But it never fails to amaze me that what ever people have going on in their lives, they always have taken the time to give support.  The people who give that support always get more replies to their posts - I think thats quite fair.

I have made some great friends through this place, and would be very lonely without it.  I wouldn't really want it to change

SnowflakeMum:

Really? it's lighthearted to not acknowledge the quality/otherwise of someone's contribution, instead just poke fun at them having a signature you don't like - which you can, by the way, turn off?

I guess I must be over sensitive then, because I don't see it as lighthearted to criticise someone in that manner. Especially when that person is one of your FB "friends".

I don't think I would be told if I wasn't wanted, just ignored, so I'd rather not take the risk. My self-esteem is fragile enough as it is (as the poster would know from reading my posts and FB statuses, actually).

ETA - sorry, I think that all sounds a bit ranty. It's just caught me by surprise - I feel a bit like I've walked into a room and heard someone I confided in about inner feelings poking fun at me for wearing the wrong shoes.

Ah ok, sorry, my mistake. I can see the OP was meant to be lighthearted, yes.

SFM it sounds like something has gone horribly wrong for you in that post, and the only person who can apologise or make it better is the person who posted it. I hope you get what you need from them x

SFM - I was very taken aback when I read the thread as well, especially as some Hitchers had been 'named and shamed' so to speak. FWIW, the names didn't stick with me and I had no recollection of you being mentioned. Don't know if that helps at all.

Madonna - thanks. I don't think I'll get an apology, nor would I ask for one - everyone has a right to say what they feel, I just wish they could be upfront about it.

Katy80 - I had the offending signature of wanting to change the world but not being able to find a babysitter ('twas a quote from a postcard a good friend sent when she was trying to reassure me I don't have to be all things to all people!)

WHazelSaid. 

I really like DW OT.  It's fast & fun and easy to use.  I never really look at DWBT, because everyone is here and it's been like OT is over here now.  (although looking this evening it seems to have picked up)

But the thing is, everyone isn't really here.  I don't know what it is, but it feels like the sense of community has gone and we're just a bunch of people now, rather than a group.  It makes me sad.

Perhaps it's time for me to move on?  Perhaps it's just a combination of this place being too slow and too fractured, and me being too busy with a toddler & a nosy baby. But then they both were napping the other day and there wasn't anything happening here to me to contribute with.  I wonder if I'm just out of mojo for giving and taking.

I'm glad I have made a RL friend in you Flaf so I have a safety net against losing you, and I know this place would be poorer without your wise woman posts, but you're right, we'll all move on sometime, and that's just life x

Snowflakemum I have read and contributed to that thread and I am sorry if anything I said offended you, but I don't think it was me. People were whinging on that thread about things that annoyed them. One of the things were signatures and tickers. Just because someone said that doesn't mean everyone thinks that or that there was 'laughing' at you. 

I for one defended signatures and tickers. Hell, I have an annoying signature myself.....am I going to get rid of it just because it annoys someone...am I hell!! Just as I wouldn't let anyone tell me what I should and shouldn't wear/eat or feel. 

I will hold my hand up to moaning about anon BFP posts, but it wasn't meant as dig at anyone that did it, honestly....it was just something that I don't 'get' but yet again if its right for someone then I say life's too short! 

Madonna hello. I'm doing well thank you! I don't think your post was a hormonal rant or anything like that and I understand now that the ribbing even tongue in cheek is stupid really. 

Lady F, please don't go!

I know what you mean about the sense of community, and I'm really hoping that this can pick up again, either on here, or DW.

I so wish hitched hadn't got so crappy and everyone moved away. Its a tough call at the moment, there are people on both forums who I want to keep in contact with. Damn it, there should be a completely new one that everyone is on!

 ETA - sfm, I really hope that you get an apology or something from whoever posted. I have always thought you contribute a lot to this forum, and fwiw your signature was how I recognised you (and other people too) when I can't always remember names!

hmm, well i don't really see why we can't post on both. I certainly will.

The only problem I have with Hitched BT is it's quiet in the evening when I'm around. I think that's why the MTTCer thread has died off (in part). I would start it, but late in the evening when everyone's gone.

Anyway, that's why I post on DW OT - because it's a bit more lively in the evening. I also don't have much to give back to the wider BT community, not having any kids 'n all - apart for my best wishes for everyone!

handbag:

Lady F, please don't go!

I know what you mean about the sense of community, and I'm really hoping that this can pick up again, either on here, or DW.

I so wish hitched hadn't got so crappy and everyone moved away. Its a tough call at the moment, there are people on both forums who I want to keep in contact with. Damn it, there should be a completely new one that everyone is on!

But that's what DW is, for OT at least. I don't see why we need a third one

Well i've just been to deadwood and read the thread over there, and tbh, some of the stuff that has been written on that thread is very rude imo. On that basis, i'm staying here.

no, wodger, it wasn't you. I totally get that people can moan about things that annoy them or that they don't get - that bit's fine, that's what forums are all about! It was the singling out of individuals that upset me, I just don't see the need for it. By all means say that signatures annoy you (although if they do, turn them off!) but why have to poke fun at any one person?

I know I can be a bit sensitive at times, so maybe I'm over-reacting - but I'd prefer to remove the sig and have people appreciate the content of my post rather than ignore my post because they're so irritated by my sig.

I do wish it wasn't so them-and-us, I have enough of that in my life as it is and I don't think it benefits anyone, really.

I honestly didn't start this thread so we could all get upset over DW (I dislike digs from either side), I would love it to be positive in terms of how we can get rid of any bugbears here for the good of the community.

We all know so many fab people who are choosing to post over there (either instead of or as well as), after all x